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*~~*Angel Kisses*~~*

Angel kisses

Camilla Donteqeuez 17/Chris Brown As Zamir Brown 18
Samone Jackson 18/Tyga as Mikhail Stevenson 18
Bre'Na Wells 19/Trey Songz As Jaclyn Neverson 21
JordynJohnson 21/ Lil Fizz As Adeledie Fredricks 22

A walk with you in the silence of the other, when you can feel each step, each sigh, when warmth of your hand can share your emotional state and each word takes on speacial significance and reflects the unique attitude to each other- it's everything beyond my wildesr dreams. you mean alot to me; remember it always in spite of everything!!! As i seal this love with a kiss.......i adore you, i love you.......forever more.


May 10,2006
Los Angles, CA
I sit my room drawing whatever came to mind. I look out the window to see it still raining. It's been raining for the past week and im loving every minute of it. Oh im so sorry, let me introduce myself, my name is Camilla Mesalina Donteqeuez, i'm 11 and im Egyptian and pertuo rican and black i have long golden brown hair and peach-hazel eyes. I'm a senior at Public Union middle school and would be going to San Deigo broading school in the fall, Anything to leave this hell call home. If you look outside of the house, you would think nothing wrong, just a perfect family......wrong. I have a crack addict for a mother and a Drug dealer/drunk for a step dad. I never knew my real father, but for what my mother said, he was just a one night stand. My mom met Donnovan when i was eight, three months of dating, they decided to get married. He the reason my mother the way she is now, it like i dont know her anymore.


speaking of her , probaly need a fix since Donnovan aint here. i get up and go down stairs to see what she wanted. she laying on ground in the same clothes she been having on since last week, her hair is matted and dry. Her eyes are bloodshot red. At one point of time, people said we look like just she was just alot more curvier than she just skin and bones.

Me: yes momma
Mom:(scratching like she got fleas) come clean this damn kitchen and start on dinner. Your daddy will be home in a little while with some friends.
Me:(mumbling) he not my dad
Mom: what was that?
Me:(sigh) nothing momma

I went in the kitchen and started cleaning up. after i was done with that, i started on dinner. I had just put the meatloaf in the oven when i heard the door much of peace and quiet. Donnovan came in the kitchen and went to the refrigderator to get a beer. he turned and look at me up and down.
Donnovan: where yo momma?
Me: if she not in th livingroom then she probraly upstairs.
I went to leave to the kitchen till Donnovan blocked my way.
Me: um excuse me.
Donnovan: you know you grown up to be a pretty young lady.

the more i stepped back, the more he came closer to me. My back hit the wall as i started to panicked.

Me: Donnovan please dont do this.

his hand guided down my shorts in between my thighs. He crushed his lips against mine and went down to my neck. I sliently cried as he inserted two fingers inside me, why is this happening to me.

Donnovan:(smirk) hmmmm i bet you taste good too.
Mom: (high) what yall in here doing?

He quickly backed off of and continued on drinking his beer. I looked up at the ceiling thanking god.

Donnovan: We just talking, i was telling her how i was proud of her, she growning up into a beautiful young lady.

Mom: yep, that my girl. (Grabbing his arm ) come on baby come dance

with me and let milly finish cooking.
He followed my mom, Then stopped at the entrance of the kitchen and turned back to me.

Donnovan:(sucking on his fingers)(smirks) Damn i was right, hopefully i get a full course meal.

with that he left into the living room. I slid down the wall and cried. I should've saw this coming, the way he looked at me, The times he brushed past me. Why is this happening to me. I got down on my knees and started praying.

Me: Our Father, Who Art in heaven, hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come, thy will be done, on earth as it is done in heaven. give us this day our daily bread. And forgives those whose trespasses, as we forgive those who tresspass against us. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. For thine is the kingdom, the power and the glory. Forever and ever. Amen.


Me:(wiping my face) yes mam

I got off the floor and went back to cooking.
1 Hour Later
I finally finish dinner and was setting up the table when my mom came and pushed me.
Mom: took your ass long enough.......just go to the room, i make the plates, your ass might take two years to set the damn table.

I did what i was told and went to my room. I locked my door and put my chair that i had in my room, under the door knob. After what happen in the kitchen, i'm staying as far away from Donnovan. I go to my dresser for night clothes so i can take a shower, Good thing i had my own bathroom. I looked down to see an old picutre of me and my bestie/crush, Zamir brown. He passed away last year, a month before my birthday. tears fell down my eyes as i remeber that day. How his blood was all on my shirt and me holding his body close to me.

A year ago
October 5,2006

Me and Zamir were sitting in the park like we always do after school. we usually stopped at my house, but since momma been "sick" latey, i haven't invited anybody over. i dont want people seeing her like that. I blamed donnovan for it, ever since they came back from that date they had last week, she being this different person that i don't reconizge. Zamir brought me out of my thoughts.

Me: i'm sorry what?
Zamir: (chuckles) i said are you going to the corn field maze party for holloween?
Me: naw i'n goood on that.
ZAMIR:(sigh)you cant save someone that don't want to be saved.
Me: excuse me?
Zamir: your cant save her, s*** she doesnt want to be save.
Me: first off how do even know that reason why i dont want to go?
Zamir: milly, remember who you talking me, Zamir brown. I know you better than you know yourself. For the past five weeks, you been making up excuses of why you cant do this and can't do that. You putting your social life on a back burner so you can help your mom, dont get me wrong, i love momma jill, but she seem like she okay where she at right now, because if she didnt, she wouldn't let that nigga shoot that s*** up her arm. so your distanting yourself from people for nothing, bascailly wasting your damn time.

i looked down on the ground registering every he said. i knew he was right, but i wasnt going down without a fight, i knew that women i admired was in there some where, i just had to find her. i felt tears coming down my face. finally releasling all the anger and hurt i had in me for the past five weeks.

Me: (crying) i just want my mom back.....i just want her back.

zamir put me on his lap and held me close while i cried. After ten minutes of crying, i wiped my eyes and my head on his chest.

Zamir: you feel better
Me: yea i do actully,................Za Za
Zamir: yeah?
Me: thanks... for everything.
Zamir: you know i got you ma, no matter what. i'm not going know where. we connected to the hip, you anit know that?

i laughed at his goofiness. He knew just how to get to smile, i dont know what i'll do without him. we got and headed back home since it was getting dark. We were walking when we decided to go to the corner store and get icecream.

Zamir: man i hope they got my chocolate chip cookie dough icecream cause all other s*** be nasty.
Me: oh no dont do cookie and cream, that the best icecream right there.
Zamir: okay i know you were drop on your head when you were a baby cause i know that didnt just come out your mouth.

We got our icecream and walked to the counter still arguing bout who icecream is better. Mr. harry was laughing at us argue and shaking his head.
Me: mr. harry, what you perfer, chocolate chip cookie dough or cookie and cream.
Mr. h: i like cookie and cream.
Me: BOOYAH Camilla one, Zamir zero.
Zamir:(rolling his eyes) anyways how much we owe you mr. harry?
Mr.h: now you know when yall come in here, yall dont have to pay for nothing.
Me: thanks mr. H

we was walking out the store when Roland or what he was known in the street bishop was leaning on the wall, like he been waiting for us. See Roland and Zamir used to be cool, i wouldn't say friends, because zamir hated to be around him. but like i said, they used to be cool untill roland got Zamir's cousin vanecisa pregnat then made her get and abortion. Zamir was so piss that he beat the s*** out Roland. This is first time seeing him since that addcident.

Roland: well well, no time no see, wat sup Zamir, Camilla.

i was going to say hi untill Zamir cut me off.
Zamir: milly go ahead and start walking i'll catch up with you.

i nodded my head and started walking. i wasn't even two block and half down the street when i heard the gunshots.

I wanted to run all the way home, but somthing to me go back. i ran back to the store to see Zamir laid on floor in a puddle of his own blood. i drop the bag and went to him, he was blarely breathing he looked at me and tried to say somthing but blood was coming out his mouth.


Mr. harry came outside with the phone to his ear calling 911. i kept my eyes on Zamir as i held him close.
Zamir:9(teing to breathe) m...m...milly
Me:(crying) shhhhh it going to be okay, the amblance will be here soon.
Zamir:: i...i ....i love you(his eyes closed)

~~~Back flash over~~~
The week after that they held his funeral at the school. Every body was hugging me, saying how sorry they was. Me and his momma held on each other as we cried. when the police came to her door with me, she knew somthing happen. I blamed myself, i shouldn't have even left his side, i shouldv'e just stayed there. The police couldn't find roland since he was the last person to see him. it like he disappered off they face of the earth. Then two day after buried Zamir, The police found Roland body behind some abandon wharehouse on the other side town. said that by looks of it his neck had been cut and looks like he been robbed. I should've been happy but i wasn' was going to bring Zamir back. I wiped my Face and put the picutre back and went back to find my night clothes. i picked out some swets and and tank top to put on. i put the clothes on my bed when an evenlope fell out the pockets of the sweats....what is this? i picked it up looking at it. it said Happy birthday from your bestie Zamir.....p.s dont open it till you birthday, you know how you are lol. I smiled knowing he must have snuck in my room and put this in my sweats. i sat on my bed and open the evenlope and read the letter.

If your reading this, that mean your either found it or it fell out the pocket of your sweats lol. i just want to say happy birthday to the second important lady in my life, l love you.
Your Bestie,
Zarmir Brown, The sexiest nigga on earth lol.

I chuckled as i read it. Zamir always knew how to make smile. I was about to put the letter back when i realized somthing else was in there. I pulled it oput and saw and covered my mouth. it was Zamir's gold chain with a basket ball on with the his number ingraved on the back of the ball. I can't belived he gave this to me. I remember the day he got it at the basket ball banquer. he face lit up with some excitment. I always thought he was going to be a basket ball star. i put it around my neck and went to the mirrior to see how it look i......perfect.

me:(holding in tears) oh Zamir......I miss you.

i got my clothes and changed and put my dirty clothes in the hamper. i got and the the cover and prayed.

Me: now i lay me down to sleep, i pray the lord my soul to keep, i should die before i wake,i prayed the lord my soul to take.......lord, make my mom better, i need her right now, she not same anymore. i feel like i'm losing her day by day. And lord send me an angel to watch over me, to protect me. In your name i pray amen.

i turned my lamp off and pulled the cover over me. I close my eyes and drifted to sleep.


i laid on my bed watching milly sleep from my Mirrior. She looked so peaceful as she clutched the gold chain that was her neck. I sighed wishing i couldbe there to hold her, tell her that every thing was going to be okay. I miss her so much. i know yall wondering what going on right? well as you know i'm dead, and beacame white lighter. A white lighter is a former human mortal who are given a second chance at life in order to serve under an angelic group known as the elders, i guess yall called it guardian angels. we protect the innocent and other future white lighters. That what i was, a future white lighter, So that night i was suppose to die, i know messed up right. The elders said i would have went up to heavens like the others but the big man(god) said i wasn't done yet. i wouldnt be able to get my wings untill i went through my rite of passage, it when a white lighter trainee get his/her first charge(innocent or future white lighter) and have to direct them in the path, we do it right, we get our wings and chose to go to heaven or become a full white lighter, and a full white light has thier elder that they obey and when that time comes, they take the elder place as the new elder. Are powers are orbing,healing,telepathic(talk in your mind) and sensing our charges with a adittional power which every white lighter has is a fifth one that is different like mine is freezing time. it scared me at first but i got the hang of it.

F/v: there you are, i been looking all over mesidona(mid-heaven) for you.

i look uop to see my Aunt Aqua who was also my elder. she died when i was a baby, when i came here i knew excatly who she was. i know she look like she could be eighteen huh? well that how old she was when she died. my mom was only sixteen when she had me. the thing is when you die, you never age, you stay the same. i sat up on my bed so she could sit down.

me: i just been in here chillin.

she looks at the mirror to what i was watching and smiled. she knew my relationship camilla and how i always came out my way to protect her and do anything for her.

Aqua: i wish i could've met her, she seem like a sweetheart.
me: she is auntie, she always keeps a smile on her face even though i could see through it, she know i hated when i saw her mad,sad or she breaks my heart to see her like this....i wish i was there with her.

Aqua: wellll.....
me: auntie i know (mocking her) welllllll, you know somthing dont you?
Aqua: i wont say anything right now, in about a hour, come to the Elders chambers.

with that she left out my room left me wondering what was going on.

i look at the mirrior watching camilla some more, making sure she was fast alseep. i waved over my mirror and change back to just me seeing my reflection. now i'm wondering what she knows, it making me uneasy.

Am hour later

I head to the elder chamber with what Aunt Aqua said. what she had to tell me? once i got there, I saw my homies Mikhail,Jaclyn,and Adeledie.when i got here, they explain about everything to me. M- ikhail Had was car aciddent and threw from the car, his power is to see the past,present and the future.Jaclyn's mom tried shoot his dad and he end up in the cross fire and got shot in the head, he a fire starter he can make and control a fire with is mind. Adeledie, he comitted suicide by taking alot of pills, instead of him going to hell, the elders gave him a second chance, he act like he don't care, but deep inside he does., his is painous emotionsau, it means he can make other peopl feel pain with his mind...very scary. They gave me a head nod and i gave them one in return. The elders orb in and sat down on thier thronez looking at us.Modunus, the Head elder nodded to my Aunt and she got up and walk towards us. She looked me and smiled and looked back at the other.

Aqua: do you know why you four are here?

we shooked are head no.

Aqua: well the elders i talked over some stuff and even though you four are still trainee, you will aleast know who your charges will be.

she turned around and went to the fountain that was in the middle of the room. she gently rose her arms up as the water came up as a wall. I couldn't belive what i seeing.....she was my charge.....Camilla was my charge.