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Brown's Family Vacation. [11/24]

I laid in the bed cuddling with my girlfriend Ava. My family <strong> hated</strong> her, especially my sisters. Ava wasn’t the type of girl they would expect me to choose. She was very uppity and looked down on certain people. She never complained about how middle-class my family was, but she would make little hints. I would quickly put that ass in check by blowing her back out. Her sex was on point. Like, she has the best pussy hands down. I swear to God, I’m not lying. Lord! Those sexy ass lips drove me crazy. She can make a nigga cum in 3.5 seconds with that mouth of hers. She has a lot of talent. When I first saw her naked, I got on one knee and proposed. Y’all know I’m not lying! She just make a nigga do stupid sh*t. And that’s all I thought about was the sex. That’s why I kept her stuck-up ass so long. I still don’t see how I end up pulling her. Maybe it was the way I came at her. I didn’t holler at her, I talked to her like I had sense. I at least acted like I did anyway.

We have been f*cking for six months now. She tells me that she loves me numerous times a day. I don’t do that love sh*t. The only thing I loved was bending that ass over and ramming my d*ck into it. Now that’s what I loved. I was in love with the sex, not the person. I played with her hair, while she stared into my eyes. She started to think. I knew when she was thinking because of that stupid look in her eye. Whenever she played with her lips, it meant she was preparing to say something to piss me off. She now sat up, “Baby, what’s food stamps? And how poor do you have to be to get them?” I bit my lip to stop from cursing this b*tch out. How the f*ck you don’t know what’s a food stamp? I don’t care what neighborhood you grew up in, you just don’t say stupid sh*t like that. “Ava, when you say stuff like that… it just makes me want to say something mean to you bae.” She rolled her eyes, while playing with her blonde extensions. “I just asked a question Christopher! No need to get mad at me! Gosh, not my fault I didn’t grow up around you people.” I now looked at the b*tch like she was crazy, “WHAT THE F*CK DOES ‘YOU PEOPLE’ MEAN?!”

She knew I was angry as hell. She also knew that my temper wasn’t anything to play with. “Baby, don’t yell at me! I didn’t mean it like that. I’m just saying I never grew up around your kind. I don’t speak ghetto-ism or Ebonics. So, I wouldn’t know homie! Did I say it right?” She questioned, now walking over to the mirror and putting make-up on. “DID YOU REALLY JUST SAY GHETTO-ISM?!” She whined, “Chris, I’m sorry. I just was curious. I didn’t mean to offend you. I know how hard it is growing up in the ‘hood G.” She now bumped her fists on her chest, trying to be ‘hood. I rolled my eyes. She better be glad her sh*t is good. I might would’ve pushed her ass out of that chair. “How much make-up are you going to add to your face? You look like a f*cking clown!” I spat, now hopping off the bed. She now put her attention on me. A shock expression plastered on her face. She threw her hand over her mouth and gasped. She now whined. I hated when she did that sh*t. Her voice is annoying as f*ck. She was one person that I didn’t mind being silent during sex. “Chris, I know you’re mad. So, I’m going to say I’m sorry if I offended you baby. I’ll make it up to you later. I promise,” She whined, walking over to me. She wrapped her arms around my waist.

“You damn right you will!” I spat, while cuffing her ass. She laughed a little and pushed me away. The door soon busts open. In walked my oldest sister, Keria. I called her twin because we were so close. I thought she was in college. What the hell she doing here? She usually would call or text me to let me know she was coming home. “Hey sexy! Mama just told me that Aunt Barbara died!” She shouted excitedly, while dancing. I now joined her dancing. None of my siblings liked Barbara! “YES! I WAS WAITING FOR HER TO DIE!” I yelled, now popping my booty on Keria. Keria got behind me and started grinding on my ass. Ava stared at us like we were contaminated with something. I didn’t even pay her any attention. She not gon’ ruin my joy! I now stopped dancing and faced Keria. “That still doesn’t explain why yo sexy ass is here b*tch!” “Nigga, we going to the funeral. So, we gon’ be staying at grandma house! That means road trip!” She jumped up and down. I jumped and down with her.

“Ava, get yo ass up and pack my suitcase!” I shouted. Ava rolled her eyes. “Get yo ass up! You ain’t doing sh*t no way! Looking like a damn clown!” Keria spat. “Don’t she look like a clown? OMG Twin! I said that sh*t!” We shared an embrace for a moment. She broke from the embrace and laughed, “Boo you so crazy!” I turned her around so that her ass was facing me. “Oh sh*t my b*tch getting thick! My nigga been d*cking you DOWN!” She laughed and bent over, shaking her ass. “You better know it!” Now people think me and my sister are weird because of our relationship. We just have that type of bond. She tells me EVERYTHING. I was the first one she told when she lost her virginity. And vice versa. We were just close like that. She stopped laughing and pushed me, “Twin, I’m not gon’ play with yo ass! I’mma be thicker than yo b*tch in a minute!” I chuckled, “Don’t get carried away! My b*tch ass fatter than a horse’s ass!” Ava didn’t find this funny at all. I really didn’t care to be honest. Keria now walked over to Ava, “B*tch, didn’t he tell you to pack his sh*t? The f*ck you waiting on?!”

Ava hopped out of the chair, “Um, home girl or however you say it, you don’t tell me what to do. Mmkay? Should I dumb it down for you? I forgot that you’re not used to being around an intelligent person.”
Keria charged towards her. I quickly grabbed her. My sister was crazy. She been to jail four times and ain’t scared to go back. If I would’ve allowed her to get loose, she would beat the hell out of Ava. And I just would’ve watched. Probably would’ve recorded the sh*t! Okay, I know that’s wrong, but Ava be getting on a nigga nerves at times! Keria got out of my grip and walked out of my room. “Are you f*cking crazy? You can’t say sh*t like that and not expect for someone to beat yo ass!” I yelled at her. She sighed and put on her puppy dog face, “Babe, I’m sorry. I will try to control myself. Meanwhile, I’ll pack your suitcase like you asked.” I smiled and slapped her on the ass, “Good girl!” I watched, while she grabbed clothes from my drawer and placed them in my suitcase. I now walked out of my room because I heard a lot of noise. I walked into the living room to see my other sister, Heather. Heather was one of my youngest sisters. She was nineteen. Her and Keria fought ALL the time. I would be right there watching they dumb ass fight. Heather would joke about Keria’s weight. Keria would go the f*ck off. She was very sensitive about her weight.

I really didn’t understand because she was nowhere near fat. Heather was gyrating. I’m assuming she got the news of Barbara’s death too. I love to shake my ass! So I joined her. Keria pushed Heather out the way and starting dropping down into a split. I now started krumping. “I’m so damn happy that old b*tch died!” I shouted, still dancing. “ME TOO! I’MMA PISS ON THE B*TCH CASKET!” Keria chimed in. “I’mma smack that ho in her face and dare a b*tch to get up and do some about it!” Heather added. My youngest sister, Anastasia walked through the door with her boyfriend Mike. Now, I couldn’t stand Mike. My sisters thought he was cute for Ana, but not I. That motherf*cka was no good! It’s bad enough that Ana does what the f*ck she wants anyway. You couldn’t tell that girl nothing! She was the absolutely worst! He instantly greeted Heather and Keria. He didn’t even acknowledge my presence.

“They ain’t the only one you see standing here nigga!” I spat. “Mane nigga I didn’t speak for a reason. You’re invisible to me!” I shot towards him. Ana pulled me back just in time. “Chris, chill. Why the hell were y’all dancing?” “Girl, Barbara died!” Keria hollered, now dancing. “WHAT?! OH F*CK YES!” Ana yelled, joining Keria. “Look at the b*tch belly move while she dance! Ho, you need to invest in a treadmill!” Heather roared, pointing at Keria and laughing. Keria stopped dancing and walked over to Heather. “B*tch, you lil’ twig ass b*tch! I feel sorry for you ho. A nigga can’t even blow too hard around you, you’ll fly away!” “Whatever b*tch! Winnie the Pooh belly having ass b*tch! My nigga sure don’t be complaining! I be riding the f*ck out of him. He just be tossing my lil’ ass around the room. And yo ho ass would know something about blowing!” Heather added, “Ooh, Twin! I know you ain’t gon’ let this b*tch talk about you!” I added.

Ana walked over to me and smacked me on the back of my head, “Shut up fool!” “Aye ho, you smacked me a lil’ too motherf*cking hard! You about to make the Mike Tyson come out of me! ‘Cuz I beat hoes!” I spat at Ana. “You ain’t gon’ do a motherf*cking thing! I’ll beat the f*ck out of you!” Mike chimed in. “Nigga, who the f*ck was talking to you?” Keria said to Mike. “B*tch, it don’t matter. Weight Watcher’s needing ass b*tch!” Heather spat, now getting in Keria’s face. “B*tch, I’ll knock yo ass out! Say one mo’ motherf*cking thing ho!” Keria roared. “FAT ASS B*TCH!” Heather yelled. Before you knew it, Keria punched Heather, causing her to fall on the floor. They were now fighting. “BEAT THAT B*TCH ASS TWIN!” I shouted, throwing money on both of them. Ana smacked me, “STOP THAT YOU DAMN FOOL!” “Ho, you got one mo’ time to hit me! I swear! You about to make the demon come out of me!” Keria and Heather were knocking down a lot of sh*t. My mama soon came in the room with a pan in her hand. She didn’t even say anything. She just popped both Keria and Heather with it.

“NAW MA! LET THEM HOES FIGHT!” I shouted, trying to get them to fight again. Mama soon walked over to me and punched me in my throat, “Motherf*cka, don’t you play with me! I’ll cut yo balls off and cook them in this pan!” I fell on the floor, trying to catch my breath. Ana stood there laughing hysterically. Mike joined her. I mugged both of them. I got off the floor, “You didn’t have to hit me like that!” “B*tch, don’t you tell me how to do anything. You better stay in yo f*cking place motherf*cker! Now all you dumb motherf*ckers better have y’all sh*t packed! We leaving today!” Ava walked in with my suitcase, “What’s all the commotion?” Heather rolled her eyes, “B*tch, why are you here? I thought it was obvious that nobody like yo ass!” Ava ignored her and handed me the suitcase. “OH, SO THIS B*TCH GON’ IGNORE ME?” Heather spat, jogging over to Ava. Mama pulled Heather by her hair and slung her into the wall. “Have y’all niggas lost y’all mind?! When the f*ck did y’all start cussing like that in my house?! I don’t even know where the f*ck y’all got that from! Go pack your sh*t now b*tches!” Mama roared, staring at all of us.

Our mother was crazy as hell. I’m talking about insane. I remember she whooped us with her pistol one day. Ava stood there stunned. She was still not used to our mother talking to us like that. She stood on the wall. My mother rolled her eyes, “Baby ain’t nobody gon’ touch yo scary ass!” “I’m tryna tell ya! Who wants her besides Twin?” Keria added. “Go pack ya sh*t now!” My mother yelled, now going down the line punching all of us in our faces. Do you know how embarrassing that is to get hit in front of your girlfriend? Everyone ran to go get there stuff. I ran to the bathroom. I had to take a sh*t! I went to the bathroom and quickly closed the door. I pulled my pants down with one tug. I hopped on the toilet. I struggled to get the sh*t out. “AHHH! COME ON! COME OUT!” I shouted in pain. After five more minutes of pushing, it did come out. I couldn’t stop sh*t from falling in the toilet. My ass was leaking. “PUSH NIGGA! PUSH!” Heather laughed at the door. “COME ON PUSH THAT SH*T OUT!” Ana added, snickering. “Twin, you almost there!” Keria shouted.

I ignored them and kept pushing the sh*t out. I couldn’t stop sh*tting. “MAMA!” “WHAT BOY?!” My mama shouted from downstairs. “MY BOOTY LEAKING!” I shouted back. “WELL, YOU BETTER WRAP YO ASS UP WITH THE SOME ALUMINUM FOIL AND SH*T THE WAY TO YO GRANDMA HOUSE!” Mama roared. This caused Keria, Twin and Heather to laugh more. I pushed out one last turd. I got off the toilet and wiped my ass. After that, I flushed the toilet. I grabbed the air freshener and sprayed the bathroom. I then, washed my hands. I opened the door. My sisters almost died at the smell. They quickly scattered. I laughed. That’s what they asses get. I could barely walk. I walked carefully downstairs to the living room. Ava was sitting on the couch. “I thought you were dead!” Ava interjected. “Well, I had to take a mean one!” I exclaimed. She scrunched her face up, “Eww Babe and I wanna go!” “GO WHERE?!” Heather yelled at Ava. “Well, I wasn’t talking to you Moesha. And I meant on the trip.” “Moesha? And honey we don’t have time for you to go home and get your stuff! We gotta go now!” Mama added. “That’s okay then, I’ll see you later babe,” Ava got up, kissing me.

“Okay.” She blew me a kiss and then walked out of the house. “I’m glad that broad left!” Heather exclaimed. “Well, Mike we getting ready to leave. So, I’ll see you when I get back,” Ana stated, while kissing Mike. He kissed her back, while walking to the door, “Aight babe.” I mean mugged him before he left. “LET’S GO NIGGAS!” My mama yelled impatiently. We all grabbed our things and ran to her car. We all got in. After we got in, mama drove off. “Ugh, we all squished up in this little car!” Keria complained. “B*TCH, GET OUT AND WALK THEN!” My mama spat, while keeping her eyes on the road. “Chris too heavy!” Ana added. “Naw, that would be Keria big ass!” Heather added. “Speaking of big ass, damn I miss Ava! I’mma f*ck the sh*t out of that b*tch when we get back! Damn mama this car is raggedy as f*ck! Jesus will come back before we get to grandma house! Sh*t!” I roared. I realized my mistake and opened the car door. I quickly jumped out of the car while she was driving. I could not get beat by mama again. I didn’t even care about me hitting the ground. She soon put the car in reverse. She got out and punched me in my back and face repeatedly. My sisters pointed and laughed. I rolled my eyes and got back into the car.



ava only gets d*** way down in her tummy lol
he dont love you he love them lips and
them lips in between them hips lol
ava said ghettoism HA to prissy
for me. we should let you play in some dirt
than come kick with them hood-browns lol
lol and keria and chris are so funny
but creepy at the same time.. lol
heather is a meanie talking about keria like that
but atleast she aint no punk

as for me CHRISSSS you gon leave mike alone
or ima come at you myself and keria you better
not jump in lol

ha our mom is a gag pistol whipping us and crap
chris to light skin for that lol

ahhhh f*** the brady bunch its
the BROWNS b****


Lmao... This s*** so funny. It reminds me of the story I wrote called Brown Family Reunion. Buuttt mixed with that one story you wrote when Chris had a twin brother Christian... Double trouble I think was the name. Their mom was crazy in that one too. Bre you are a fool. Wish you lived close. I'd take you to work with me lol.

Run it



what a family!!! lmao


LOL!! omg this story is too damn funny. it reminds me of my family lol

Ava gon get her ass beat talkin like that to ppl she needs to get a grip on reality and get it out of her fantasy land keria and chris are some weird siblings and me and keria were fighting already but damn moms had to hit us with the pan and punched all of us smh. Chris was takin a dump lol thats too nasty his booty was leaking. We all in that small car and chris jumps out to not get beat but does anyway lmao RUN IT!!

Lol @ Pinkie . . ..

Ava is a SLUUUT lol

<strong>bree...*i put my hand over my heart* i feel you.
fxck spam.</strong>

chris ain't playing with ava, boi!

Ava reminds me of Jennifer from Basketball wives asking about f.s.

avaaaa....she is so funny. lmaoooo. she's really tryna feel his anger, no, it's not gonna happen. she's too funny tryna talk like that.

this family vacation gonna be K-RA-ZY!

Run It!

"The only thing I love is bendin' that ass over and rammin' my d*** in it"