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Diary Of A Wimpy Chris

Chapter 1
Chris P.O.V.

Most people look forward to the holidays but as for <ahref="http://0.tqn.com/d/top40/1/0/O/4/cbrown.jpg ">me</a> it only makes me nervous. Like this whole Santa thing. Just knowing some old bearded man is watching me scares me. That’s why from now on I choose to sleep with underwear on. I don’t need him looking at what I’m packing. Then there’s this “naughty or nice” list that I can’t understand. If there was such a list, then how come I never saw it? My mom tried to pull on me yesterday saying-“Chris is you babysit your little sister, you’ll get something extra from Santa!” I know these are all lies though.

For example there’s my neighbor his names Debo, if any one DESERVES to be on that naughty list its him. Just last year he stole $800 worth of liquor from the corner store. Instead of punishing him, his parents bought him a new car! I don’t know about ya’ll but I don’t know what Santa was thinking. My mom went searching through her old trunk and found a Christmas doll her great grandparents gave her. She said the doll tells Santa all the good and or bad we’ve done. Personally I hate the little bastard. This morning I went to the shower and it was there. The kitchen, it was there! Garage, garden, livingroom IT WAS THERE!!!!

But I think my older brother<ahref="http://www.acrossthefader.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/Wiz-Khalifa.jpeg ">Wiz</a> aka Smokey put it there. We call him Smokey cause you will never catch this nigga WITHOUT smoking. Even when we in church this nigga taking a puff puff give. He says the Lord gave us weed to help out mind. But I know that weed ain’t ding nothing but slowly deteriorating his brain lol. His girl <ahref="http://www1.pictures.zimbio.com/gi/Lola+Monroe+BET+Rip+Runway+2011+Arrivals+fVF8tO3vkt6l.jpg ">Lauren</a> keeps warning him about that, but he don’t listen.

He keeps telling her that he stopped smoking. Of course she don’t believe him. I think any woman can tell when a man is lying. They send a signal all around the world and then it comes back and bites your ass in the ass. Woman can detect ALL bulls***. That’s why I chose not to test them. I walked upstairs into the attic and brought down the Christmas tree that we were putting up today. Don’t get me wrong I loved putting it up but the part I hate is when my mother makes us sing that damn song they song on the Grench Stole Christmas when they were all surrounding the tree. Yeah that’s right my mother made us sing that damn song.

Monday

Right before Thanksgiving break, my school had a contest. The contest was to come up with the best Christmas song and the winner gets to sing it with the one and only DESTINY’S CHILD in New York City live in Manhattan Square infront of billions of people. Now I don’t wanna brag but a brotha can knock girls out the seat. I’m definitely entering that contest. Maybe just maybe then I could get noticed and become popular. But I don’t think it will stop the bullying. Yeah I get bullied a lot around school. Just because I’m skinny and a lil tall and not to mention my soft voice.

We have one of the most memorable bullies in Essex High School. His names Damian Pearly. The day before Thanksgiving there was a anti-bullying assembly and everyone looked at him. I kindna felt bad for the guy but I wasn’t gonna say nothing. I just felt that he was that way for a reason. Not just because he could bully someone, I think there is a reason. To bad I’m not the one he wants to open up too. I try my best to stay in the shadows cause I don’t want to end up with an embarrassing nickname. For instance, in Pre-K a girl named Cassie got stuck with the nickname s***ty Kitty. They called her that cause she ALWAYS took a s*** in her dress before she could make it to the bathroom. If I ever got a nickname like that I’d die of embarrassment.

Teachers always say come to them when you’re getting bullied. Which is a good idea except when the bully is in your neighborhood. I remember a few months ago I was getting bullied by Nasty Nat. I couldn’t figure out why he got that nickname but right now that doesn’t matter. Everytime me and Wiz walked through the neighborhood he’d chase after us with a broken bottle. When I realized the teachers weren’t gonna do s***, I called on my dad. He told me that I should confront the bully. So we went to his house and knocked on the door. We waited for his parents to come to the door, but instead <ahref="http://usversusthem.files.wordpress.com/2007/11/gary-coleman.jpg ">he</a> came to the door. Me and Wiz took off running down the street not looking back.

I guess I should’ve described him more right? Well my dad talked to his mother and she explained that her son was only 5 and he could get out of hand sometimes. Man I don’t care what nobody say that boys a lil thug. My <ahref="http://api.ning.com/files/vUnpg*WjD8QOjo1UAIHc9LvqgRkz2aDj0YGwbjKGBNO4YsuzP6nOeyUI8FC6OO*C*I2iXv7e2QxPWfNEEnEnb9tLa*0K-DdH/willdemps.png">dad</a> was pissed at us for letting ourselves get bullied by a kid in kindergarten. but hell its not liek i stopped to ask him why he was chasing us.

I closed my diary slowly and looked outside at the snow covered ground. By then everyone in the house was sleep. I sighed, I couldn't believe it was snowing already. OH well.....welcome to Virginia. I drew a snowflake on the window and blew on it and watched it disappear. I did that a few times til I heard what sounded like a branch snapping or something. I opened my window and poked my head out...nothing. I almost closed it down when I heard a small female shriek. I looked over to see April. We've been friends for the longest. She's so down to Earth, funny, smart and most of all beautiful. Trust me when I say this girl knows me like the the back of her hand and vise versa. She looked at me smiling.

Hey Chris, what you doing?

Trying to figure out why the hell your up so late, and creeping trynna see me naked. She rolled her eyes as I smiled helping her in. She looked around at all of the decorations my mother put in my room. I sighed feeling embarrassed because it looked kinda girly. I glanced over at her giggling.

What's so funny??

Oh nothing its just your room is so....festive. Must be mama Joyce's idea. I rolled my eyes.

For the last time its Joyce not Joyce. I bet your slightly confused well let me explain. Ever since we were kids she's been calling my mom Joyce like Joe-See not Joy-s the correct way. We always have to remind her.

Yeah yeah, whatever. How about we have some hot cocoa while watching the snow fall down?

Sounds like a plan to me. I snuck downstairs and made us some hot cocoa. When I got back there was soft music playing in the background and April sitting by the window. I walked over and handed her her mug. I laid down beside her now enoying the view. She turned to me.

Cheers.

Cheers for what?

Well you know our friendship anniversary is This Christmas. Sixteen years of dealing with eacho others dramatic interesting life.....cheers.

.....Cheers. We continued to sit there and talk quietly while the snow fell and made a soft white blanket over the streets.

I know it was kinda weak but
Run It? Or Dump It?
P.S. Could someone tell me how to put a pic on here again I so forgot how to do it, thxxies :)

Comentarios

Run it run it run it

What happen to thiis story i liked this one run itt

Runn ittt.

Idc , Idc I love this story! <3
Cant wait for the next update (:

They are some fools lol

Run it!!!

Man the fightin over weed smh lol
Run it

Runs!!!

CHAPTER 2(preview)

Wednesday

I hate this damn doll!!! The things I use to do before Christmas I can’t do them anymore. For instance when my mom and dad use to put gifts under the tree, I couldn’t help but know what they were. One of the gifts had my name on it, I was sure it was that new game system I had been asking for. And sure enough it was the new XBOX 360. I was happy as f***, it was sold out all over the world since they had just came out in May. It was bugging me that I already knew what I had. So I grew so impatient that one night I snuck it up to my room and played resident Evil 4. But I started to grow nervous cause I thought my parents would notice that big empty box under the tree.

So I stuffed the empty box with rocks so it would equal the same weight as the XBOX. When I opened the gift up infront of mom and dad they were both confused and angry. The next day they took the box back to Wal-Mart and cursed the people out for “scamming” them. I just can’t help myself guys, last year I went on my dad’s e-mail to send a message to all of my relatives to see what they were giving me for Christmas. But now my parents keep the computer in the living room and that’s where…..the doll is. Today I’m thinking extra hard about what I want on my Christmas list. If I left it up to my parents I’d have something crazy!

A few years ago my mom was pregnant with my little sister Yazmine. So for Christmas she bought me a baby doll! But then after a while I realized he could come in handy. It was pretty nice having a doll you could feed all of your vegetables too. Not only that she came in good hands as a book holder. But I think I got too attached to it. When I had came home from school I couldn’t find her and I went crazy. I searched the whole house even went door to door asking the neighbors did they see her. I knew for sure my mom would think I wasn’t responsible enough when the baby came.

So I took a squash from the garden and drew a face on it and wrapped it in a blanket. It worked out for over the next few months. But I was afraid that the REAL doll would seek revenge on me and I wake up with her standing over me with a knife saying “Hi, I’m Cindy wanna play?”…….I watch too much Chuckee. Anyways from now on I’m only asking my parents for store bought gifts. Last Christmas my mom bought me this really nice watch. But then I was looking through some family photos and saw the exact watch on my dead grandpa.

So I pawned the s***. That’s just creeping having a dead man’s watch. Well this is all for now dear diary. I shut it close and walked downstairs. Sitting on the couch was my brother wiz smoking weed for the fourth time today. Sitting across from him was our homeboys Trey, Hosea, and Deandre. I covered my nose cause it was smelling strong as hell up in here.

Nigga….can ya’ll stop smoking just for a lil bit?

Look…if you ain’t got no job and you ain’t smoking no weed I don’t know what the f*** you doing with your life. Trey got up and stared walking around in circles.

What the hell you doin nigga? Andre said while taking a puff of his cigarette laughing high as hell. I shook my head and walked into the kitchen. I could here them fussing over who took a puff of someone else weed. I made me a quick ham and cheese sandwich and walked back in there and sat on the couch.

It was a mistake taking you to that party man, a damn mistake. See I had invited Wiz to my friend Rogers house and they both tried weed for the first time and were hooked.

Look bruh bruh saying weed is against the law is like saying God made a mistake….weed is from the Earth and Earth is from God, he put this here for us! Take advantage man, take advantage. Cause I’m helping the Earth once you think about it. I’m recycling this damn paper, I’m reducing the amount I have to pay for this weed cause I’m growin my own, and I’m reusing this damn lighter cause I’m getting high as f***!!!

He said laughing in that stupid laugh of his. I just sat there for a while thinking to myself, I really had to get some real friends.

I Know its kinda short but there will be more later I gotta get my homework done -.-

CHAPTER 2

Wednesday

I hate this damn doll!!! The things I use to do before Christmas I can’t do them anymore. For instance when my mom and dad use to put gifts under the tree, I couldn’t help but know what they were. One of the gifts had my name on it, I was sure it was that new game system I had been asking for. And sure enough it was the new XBOX 360. I was happy as f***, it was sold out all over the world since they had just came out in May. It was bugging me that I already knew what I had. So I grew so impatient that one night I snuck it up to my room and played resident Evil 4. But I started to grow nervous cause I thought my parents would notice that big empty box under the tree.

So I stuffed the empty box with rocks so it would equal the same weight as the XBOX. When I opened the gift up infront of mom and dad they were both confused and angry. The next day they took the box back to Wal-Mart and cursed the people out for “scamming” them. I just can’t help myself guys, last year I went on my dad’s e-mail to send a message to all of my relatives to see what they were giving me for Christmas. But now my parents keep the computer in the living room and that’s where…..the doll is. Today I’m thinking extra hard about what I want on my Christmas list. If I left it up to my parents I’d have something crazy!

A few years ago my mom was pregnant with my little sister Yazmine. So for Christmas she bought me a baby doll! But then after a while I realized he could come in handy. It was pretty nice having a doll you could feed all of your vegetables too. Not only that she came in good hands as a book holder. But I think I got too attached to it. When I had came home from school I couldn’t find her and I went crazy. I searched the whole house even went door to door asking the neighbors did they see her. I knew for sure my mom would think I wasn’t responsible enough when the baby came.

So I took a squash from the garden and drew a face on it and wrapped it in a blanket. It worked out for over the next few months. But I was afraid that the REAL doll would seek revenge on me and I wake up with her standing over me with a knife saying “Hi, I’m Cindy wanna play?”…….I watch too much Chuckee. Anyways from now on I’m only asking my parents for store bought gifts. Last Christmas my mom bought me this really nice watch. But then I was looking through some family photos and saw the exact watch on my dead grandpa.

So I pawned the s***. That’s just creeping having a dead man’s watch. Well this is all for now dear diary. I shut it close and walked downstairs. Sitting on the couch was my brother wiz smoking weed for the fourth time today. Sitting across from him was our homeboys Trey, Hosea, and Deandre. I covered my nose cause it was smelling strong as hell up in here.

Nigga….can ya’ll stop smoking just for a lil bit?

Look…if you ain’t got no job and you ain’t smoking no weed I don’t know what the f*** you doing with your life. Trey got up and stared walking around in circles.

What the hell you doin nigga? Andre said while taking a puff of his cigarette laughing high as hell. I shook my head and walked into the kitchen. I could here them fussing over who took a puff of someone else weed. I made me a quick ham and cheese sandwich and walked back in there and sat on the couch.

It was a mistake taking you to that party man, a damn mistake. See I had invited Wiz to my friend Rogers house and they both tried weed for the first time and were hooked.

Look bruh bruh saying weed is against the law is like saying God made a mistake….weed is from the Earth and Earth is from God, he put this here for us! Take advantage man, take advantage. Cause I’m helping the Earth once you think about it. I’m recycling this damn paper, I’m reducing the amount I have to pay for this weed cause I’m growin my own, and I’m reusing this damn lighter cause I’m getting high as f***!!!

He said laughing in that stupid laugh of his. I just sat there for a while thinking to myself, I really had to get some real friends.

I Know its kinda short but there will be more later I gotta get my homework done -.-

Runn it

CHAPTER 2 WILL BE UP IN A FEW :D

lol his name is smokey lol f***in weed head ....run it

I lIke it andd

<a href=" (the link)">the name of what it is</a>

Thxxies guys more soon :D

Run it!

And go to More information about formatting options it tells you!

Now come run it sis!

Run it

Aaaaweee I like this! Its different & funny.
Chris should stand up to all them little bullies.
Like , i cant.. I LOL'd through the whole Chapter xD
Keep it running (:

Lol he got chased by a lil boy and how you goin to smoke in the lords house smh
Run it!!!