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What is the point of loyalty if your only loyalty is to your self? Is it wrong to want more, to feel the need for more? Have you ever sat and thought to your self what is the point of living if it only brings you disappointment and pain? Well I have, I sit and think to myself about this every day! I have a lot of time by myself, see my brother is my legal guardian and he never lets me go no where. I’m 17 years old and the only time I leave my stoop is when I go to school. Friends I have none basically none of them can stand my ass, cause either my brother or one of his friends have done them wrong. My best friend Shamilya moved to Harlem last summer and other than the ever now and again phone calls and letters I don’t see her.
It feels like I’m in a small prison ever since she left, she lives damn near 15 minutes away and I haven’t seen her in a year. Maybe it’s me maybe I’m just bugging cause its another late night and my brother isn’t home yet, and once again he hasn’t called to let me know he’s even alive. Maybe I should just say my prayers go to bed and hope with all the faith I have inside me that he’s in his room when I wake up tomorrow morning.

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i love it alreadii!!!
run it

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~~~i So LiiKe rOq~~

Omg this is so gudd!!
Run It ASAP♥
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Missz Br33zY♥

Ugh Saturday mornings are always the best this is the one day I actually get to do what ever. My brother usually goes to Jersey to visit his girl and their son so I usually go up to the mall to shop and make it back before he hit’s the door. “Good morning”, I always hated talking to my brother in the morning because he always had something on his mind, which meant he was always ignoring me. “Hello I said good morning”, “Man Chasity I know you see me sitting here thinking, I don’t know why you come in here every morning messing with me.” He was always snapping on me when I interrupted his deep thoughts, but always expected me to stop what ever I was doing to give him my attention. “What ever all I was saying was good morning, you always snappin on me if any one should be snapping around this b**** it should be me!”. that was usually when I stormed out of the room but this morning he wouldn’t give up with out a fight. “ And what is that suppose to mean huh? You got a place to live, food to eat, clothes, and every thing else you need.”, “ Ugh what ever just drop it Chris!”
“No Chasity I wanna know what you mean. You always say I don’t let you speak your mind well then speak the s***! You wanna be grown so damn bad well then lets hear it!!” I couldn’t believe him, it had been a while since he actually raised his voice at me. “You, I never get to do nothing I can never go no where. I’m 17 years old and I have to worry about you! Your suppose to be looking after me worrying about me not the other way around!! You stay out always in the streets always got beef which means another day, week, month, and year stuck on this damn block. You go out you leave and I’m stuck here looking stupid.” , “ Is that what you think Chasity that I don’t worry about you that I don’t care? I spent every day of the last year taking care of you. I didn’t have to do that, I coulda sent you off to foster care but no I didn’t. I do this stuff to protect you to keep you safe. I don’t want you out there like these other females bein a slut ass hoe.” As Chris looked at me I knew he I hurt him deep with the words I said. I didn’t mean to hurt him it was just the way I felt. As he walked out the front door I stood there with tears forming in my eyes, thinking about the words he had just said.