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Crazy Sh.it in my Life (CHAPTER 1)

(CHAPTER 1). ANIYAH (pronounced Uh- Ni - Uh or Ania if you prefer)

"Girl I swear I am the only normal person in this family" I said to my best friend Trina. I had just came back from my Aunt Aquashiquananiquianashanaynay Taylor's (pronounced Aqua- Shiquana- Niqui-Ana-Shanay-Nay- Taylor. Crazy name yes I know, my friend came up with the name and I spelled it as best as I could remember.) Wedding and I had already changed. "What happened?" She asked "Girl I was at my Aunt Aqua's wedding, and that was some s***! Lemme show you what she had me wearing. Girl this ensemble is <strong> NOT </strong> something you wear to a church!" I said to her <a href="http://www.kimhess.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/vegas-dress.jpg"> dress, </a> <a href="http://d1535dk28ea235.cloudfront.net/preset_61/alluring-and-dangerous-heels2.jpg"> shoes, </a> <a href="http://media2.onsugar.com/files/2011/09/35/0/1852/18523920/3b39d38f4ce116c9_Black_Girl_Prom_Hairstyles_C.jpg"> hair, </a> <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/noir_gothly/5385853590/"> Makeup </a>, <a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-259aAy7FNVI/TueXBBpHW_I/AAAAAAAABfo/jxR6re4jyuo/s1600/4.jpg"> jewelry, </a> <a href="http://www.cocodresses.com/images/samples/wedding%20tiaras%2003.jpg"> tiara </a>.
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<em>AT THE WEDDING</e>
I looked at the dress Aqua handed me. <em> What kinda s*** is this?</em> I thought to myself. <em> This is <strong> NOT</strong> something you wear to a wedding .</em> I. Than look over to the left of me and see some heels that look like they will hurt the s*** out of my feet. "Hair time! Put on that dress later" my cousin Exotica Tang said coming in the room. Yes her name is Exotica Tang her first name. Her mom thought it was pretty to me it sounds like she's a pornstar. I walked into the bathroom with my cousins Asami (morning beauty) and Brenda. "Hey B!" I said trying to start a conversation. I don't realy like her. She always talks to me like I can't understand English. b**** is so judgemental! Just because I'm Japanese and black doesn't mean I don't understand English. I was born in America not Japan. "Heeeeeeeey. AAAAAArrrreeeeent youuu ex ciiii teddddddd" she said to me. This b****. "Yea its gonna be great! I'm excited but you don't need to talk to me like that." I said bending my head so the stylist could curl my hair. "Liikkee whhaattttt?" She questioned. "Like I'm stupid, special needs, hard at hearing, can't comprehend the words coming from your mouth, or that I don't understand English. I have no issues with understanding a word you are saying" I explained to her. She just rolled her eyes. This worthless b****! After about 45 minutes my hair was finally finished. I left got dressed and came back to get my makeup done. I looked into the mirror and was hella mad. " <em> These worthless b****es! (If you haven't noticed this is my phrase for this story) I'm Asian and they always wanna make me look like an anime. Or a harajuku, or a geisha, or a porcelain doll, or a Japanese nurse, or a Japanese school girl. </em>. I was an anime today. I sighed and finally looked at my wholeself in the mirror. Why the f*** do I look like this? This isn't cute. At all. It looks like I'm gonna be wearin this bulls*** and I know for a fact imma have to close my eyes for every friggin picture. Whatever. "Tiiiimmme for theee weddiiiinnnnnnnnggg get rreaddyyy forrr the al-t-ar" I didn't even have to look. I knew that was Brenda. You see this b**** was gonna make me kill her. I'm gettin tired of her s***. I put on a fake ass smile and walked out the room. The wedding was outside the church and the reception inside. Kinda backwards I know. "Hey before yo go, I wanted to give you this" Don said. He handed me a small box "don't open it untill you are situated". I nodded and continued outside and took my place at the altar. I opened the box and saw <a href="http://www.langantiques.com/images/external/10/1240250323_7.92_Carat_European_Cut_Diamond_Engagement_Ring_Main_View10-1-2428.jpg"> this </a>. They want me to put <em> this </em> on <em> my </em> finger. Dayumm I gotta see what the bride has! I slipped the ring on my finger and got ready for the start of the wedding. I stood at the alter waiting for everybody else to come out. After about 5 minutes the wedding started the<a href="http://www.mywedding.com/blog/wp-content/gallery/ashley-eddie/13-groom-groomsmen-fence-suits-pink-black-white.jpg"> grromsman </a> all came out looking great. So did the <a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_dp2w6YEi4UA/TS-3uWEhOyI/AAAAAAAAA2Y/MQ6bpZlmzgY/s1600/black-or-white-bridesmaid-dresses-2.jpg"> bridesmaids </a>. I noticed that I am standing there all revealing and s***. WTF? The <a href="http://www.zimbio.com/pictures/vEqMPai82Y3/41st+NAACP+Image+Awards+Portraits/wMBtBzs-t7Y"> groom </a> looked good too. <a href=" http://www.google.com/imgres?q=lil+kim&num=10&hl=en&gbv=2&biw=927&bih=629&tbm=isch&tbnid=x8WuiCcFQz8MdM:&imgrefurl=http://newprentiss.wordpress.com/2012/02/24/lil-kim-to-perform-on-rip-tha-runway/&docid=VS_Vepy14OH9AM&imgurl=http://newprentiss.files.wordpress.com/2012/02/vibevixen_lil-kim.jpg&w=542&h=864&ei=IUyDT-SHG6fZiQK1tcH2Ag&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=708&vpy=30&dur=1884&hovh=284&hovw=178&tx=156&ty=134&sig=111998418867733210683&sqi=2&page=1&tbnh=115&tbnw=72&start=0&ndsp=17&ved=1t:429,r:4,s:0,i:154"> Aqua </a> came out with <a href="http://www.weddingdresscentre.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/short-wedding-dress2.jpg"> this </a> on. The pastor started to speak "Proverbs 31:10-31 (New International Version)

“A wife of noble character, who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life. She selects wool and flax and works with eager hands. She is like the merchant ships, bringing her food from afar. She gets up while it is still dark; she provides food for her family and portions for her servant girls. She considers a field and buys it; out of her earnings she plants a vineyard. She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks. She sees that her trading is profitable, and her lamp does not go out at night. In her hand she holds the distaff and grasps the spindle with her fingers. She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy. When it snows, she has no fear for her household; for all of them are clothed in scarlet. She makes coverings for her bed; she is clothed in fine linen and purple. Her husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land. She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies the merchants with sashes. She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: "Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all." Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. Give her the reward she has earned, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate" he finished. Throughout the whole time, the Groom was looking at me. I looked down at the <a href="http://www.novori.com/images/solitaire-platinum-cathedral-setting.jpg"> ring </a>. Fake ass ring! But mine want. Maybe it was a mistake? After everything was over it was time for the dances. I danced with <em> everybody </em> The last one was with the groom. He danced with me for an hour and his bride for 10 minutes.
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I finsihed telling Trina the story and she looked dumb founded. "What kind of s*** was that?" Trina asked. "Girl I dont even know. It's like I was the only one who realized he was spending more on me than on her. That's his wife. He even invited me to their honeymoon to <a href=" http://www.luxuryhideaways.net/images/tahiti/Tahiti-tikehau.jpg"> Tahiti </a>. Should I go?" I asked her. "I dunno" Trina said. "He told me I could bring a friend" I said hintinlgy. "Yea if I can go too" Trina said. "Yea you can come. He said he'd pay for a friend for me. But you know what else?" I asked her. "What?" she asked back "He said he isnt paying for <strong>her </strong> friends tho. He isnt even gonna pay for <strong> her </strong>" I said to her. She shook her head. "Lemme go call my mommy" she said running out the room. She was gone for like 10 minutes than she skipped back into my room. "She said I could go" Trina squealed. We both squealed and jumped up and down. "Get packin chica it's in two days" I told her. She nodded and went home.

*How yall think this trip is gonna go? You think there will be drama?*
I didnt come up with what the pastor said. I got it <a href="http://www.pibweddings.com/weddingreadings.html"> here </a>