Newsletter Link

48 Fans Online
Don't Judge Me

( INTRO )
The girls and I began to get ready for the Chris Brown concert. It was my 18th birthday and I've always been a die hard Chris Brown fan even through all the bad stuff he went through and all the changes. I did the finishing touches on my hair and make up then put on my sexy baby blue dress and the silver heels. I did the accessories and checked out the ending results in my full length mirror. Just looking at myself all I could say was DAMN!! I confidently walked downstairs and all eyes landed on me. I heard my step brother's friends whispering about how sexy I looked. He snapped himself out of the lil trance he was in and hit them.

"Well damn girl just make us look like some Goodwill swap meat rejects!"

Sasha yelled out and we all laughed. I hugged my mom and step dad then my step brother and we left.

{ CONCERT }
The girls and I sat front row as Chris Brown performed 'Dont Judge Me', 'Countdown', 'Biggest Fan', and a throwback 'Invented Head'. In between songs he would clown, dance, and bring on other artists. The show was coming to an end in about 15 minutes. I swear those 2 hours went by as I glanced at the time on my iPhone 5.

"Now for this last song I'm gunna need a special lady up here. Where's my special lady at?? Let me hear ya!"

The girls began screaming at the TOP of their lungs. Chris looked around the audience then his eyes landed 1 place I thought they never would. On me.

"Shawty right there. I wan you."

My girls screamed as he pointed at me. The security guards came and escorted me to the top of the stairs then Chris gently took my hand in his and brought me to a chair.

"What's ya name gorges??"
"Kiara."
"Well Ms. Kiara I hope you don't mind this."

He said as he pulled my body close to his and wrapped his arms around me from behind.

"Can I hold you like this??"

I nodded my head and bit my lip.

"What about if I do this??"

He began kissing on my neck and lightly sucking on it. I moaned a little and he smirked.

"Do you mind that??"

I shook my head no unable to speak fearing that another moan would escape. The beat to '2012' dropped and the crowd went wild. He sat me in the chair and gave me a sexy ass lapdance sneaking kisses in and sucking on my neck. After that song came on they came and took the chair then the 'Sweet Love' beat dropped and the crowd really went wild. He serenaded me as we grinded and he was shocked that I could keep up and move like this. After a lil while he laid me on the stage floor and humped me. I bit my lip and flopped him over so I was humping me. I rubbed my hand on his abs and I could feel him hardening. We stood up and he kissed me as the song ended and we disappeared under the stage.

"Damn. How old are you??"

He asked examining my body closely and biting his lip. Damn that man does things to me!

"As of today 18."

He nodded his head.

"You here alone??"
"I came with my girls."
"Well do me a favor. Let them know you're not leaving with them tonight."

I smirked and did just as he said then found him again and we left to his hotel room after he took pics with fans and signed autographs. From the time we hit the limo to the bedroom neither of us could take it anymore. Let's just said we definitely did it like it was the end of the world. ;-}

As much as I look back on that night and think about it I was not expecting the events that were to come ..

Comments

Aww damn Chris, told her she was loving the crew tho. Damn But he has a point she wants to move on but every guy shes moved on with has been Chris's friend. Yeah sounds like crew love to me. And Chris needs to quit making excuse and just wife her already s***. And Im mad that she Kiara gave in and smashed Chris, yall still aint in a commited relationship, but you still smashed him Ugh. Not good. I wouldn't be waiting on Chris I'd move on, just not with no more of his homies. RUN IT!!1

I do I just hurt my arm so I'm not fully going into details until it's healed
Writing now though ..

So...y is she f***ing Chris...when they're not together n he still b f***ing other girls? I'm so damn confused...they need to get it together. How she gone expect him to do better and to be more than his baby mama when she letting him get the goods before he prove himself? He gonna just continue doing what he do if he know he can still get it wit just saying he'll do better...idk. They pissing me off. So...u don't do detailed sex scenes i see?

Run it!!

I understand Chris wants to be good for her but she's right he need to stop messing around run it

mhmm , we'll see . it takes two so how is she lookin' like a hoe when her friends keep going after her ? that's the same thing so it's not being a hoe . she's just being naive .

I don't see where what he said was wrong....hell....s*** that was crew love.....and even though it's not her intentions...it did make her look bad.

{ CHAPTER 24 }

Chris was keeping Diamond this week so after dinner I went home. I was on the phone with Trey for 3 hours getting to know him. He's sweet, charming, honest, funny, and caring. I showered then went to bed.

{ MORNING }
Chris called me after he dropped Diamond off at school. I was putting my heels on and since my car was in the shop he came to pick me up.

"You look sexy as f***."
"Thanks. You don't look too bad yourself."
"Well you know I try."

We stopped for breakfast at IHOP.

"Get whatever you want my treat."
"Better be."

He laughed a little then I got a text.

Trigga - Good morning beautiful ;-]
Me - Good morning Trey =]
Trigga - Where you at??
Me - Breakfast with Chris.
Trigga - Wanna do lunch with me??
Me - Rain check?? Chris and I have a meeting at Diamond's school.
Trigga - Ok =[
Me - Sorry. =[

"Damn girl who you texting??"
"Trey."

He rolled his eyes and took a sip of his orange juice.

"Chris-"
"I don't even wanna have this conversation."
"Why are you so angry?? You don't wanna be with me so why can't I talk to someone who's interested??"
"He's only interested in f***ing you. He doesn't want you like that. Besides why the niggas you talk to gotta be MY niggas. You look like a hoe. Face it you're loving the crew."

I just stared at him. I looked down then I heard him sigh.

"Kiara-"
"I didn't know you felt that way Chris."
"Baby-"
"I'll stop talking to Trey. It's fine."

He tried to get me to talk to him, but I gave him 1 word answers or a head nod or head shake. After breakfast he dropped me off at work while he ran errands. I had a lot to do so Chris went to the meeting without me. After work he picked me up and dropped me home. I got comfortable then ordered Chinese. Chris and Diamond walked in using his key. She went to take a bath and he sat next to me.

"I gotta fly out tomorrow for 2 days."
"Ok."

The doorbell rang then I got my food and paid for it. I went to my room with my food then after I ate Chris and I read Diamond a bedtime story, said our prayers, then Chris sang her to sleep. I went back to my room and put my leftovers in my fridge downstairs. Once back in my room I sprayed the Caramel air freshener and laid down. Chris came in taking off his things and got in bed with me.

"I'm sorry about earlier. I shouldn't have said that to you. That was disrespectful."
"Ok."
"Kiara."

He rolled me onto my back and laid on top of me staring into my eyes.

"I don't wanna lose you."
"Chris-"
"Let me finish."
"Ok."
"I seen ya beauty inside and out after I got to know you. The REAL you. Just like Tyga did. Just like Trey and any other niggas after him will do. I'm afraid I'm gunna lose you to someone and you'll forever be JUST my baby mama."
"Chris you won't lose me. You can't keep putting me to the side while you do you though. I'm not a toy you can use then put away when something better comes along. I have feelings Chris."
"Why didn't you tell me how you felt??"
"Why didn't you tell me??"
"I have a hard time expressing my feelings."
"I can see that."
"But on the real I wanna be ya dream guy. I don't want my baggage and old ways to mess up our relationship when we take that step."
"f***ing other girls won't help Chris. You're just pushing me away."

He put his forehead against mines.

"Can you forgive me?? I want you. No I NEED you. Please don't give up on me."
"I won't boo. I won't. But you gotta stop."
"..."
"Chris-"
"I'll try. I wanna be better for you. For Diamond. For us."

He kissed me all over my face then gave me a long desired kiss. Eventually we took it to that level and it was the most beautiful thing I've ever experienced.

run it !

he's gonna be a second too late . he'll see . run it .

Keep the runs coming & I'll update when I get home

f*** that waiting s***...if he being a player, she can be one too. i just would prefer that she f*** with people he not cool with...i still see that as slick disrespectful...but then again, chris is disrespectful af too...smh idk how i feel about the relationships between chris and kiara and other people...

run it!!!

run it...llz getting good

Chris need to hurry up when she was with Ty that was like Chris's warning run it

I'm with Kiara but not all the way. I see what Chris is trying to do, he's trying to be the perfect man for her as soon as they start a relationship, not wthey spill ork on being that man while still are. I hope he beats Trey to her, cause if she goes with Trey I'm labeling her a hoe.
Run it

Ok girl....true you ain't got to wait on Chris forever...but please keep it the f*** cute and not homie hop....please....ain't nobody gone wife a girl that smashes the homies.

{ CHAPTER 23 }
That night Chris and Diamond played in her play room while I cooked baked mac and cheese with shrimp in it, friend chicken, and sweet corn. Chris came into the kitchen and put his arms around my waist resting his head on my shoulder and kissed my neck.

"What you cooking mama??"
"I told you when we 1st got here."

We're at Chris' house.

"I forgot. Is that baked mac I smell??"
"Yeah with the shrimp in it."
"Your favorite."
"Yes. Fried chicken with a side of sweet corn."
"Diamond's favorite."
"And the strawberry cheesecake is already done."
"My favorite. Thank you mama."
"No problem daddy."
"Damn I love you."

He whispered in my ear softly kissing it.

"I know. I love you too."
"Not like how I love you though."
"Where's 1 of ya hoes??"
"I told her I'll call her when I want her. I think Candace coming tonight."

I shook my head.

"I don't know why you're shaking ya head."
"Chris you're 25. When are you gunna give up the player card??"
"When I'm 30."

He laughed, but I didn't.

"Chris I'm serious."
"You tryna settle down with me??"
"I would love to have my baby daddy also be my husband and my lover."
"Just give me a lil more time."

I sighed.

"Chris I'm not going to wait forever. I've been living in v.a. for 2 years now. If you don't hurry up someone is gunna snatch me up."
"Like Trey??"
"You never know."
"He's not the settle down type. He sees you as a pretty face and a banging body."
"Just like I was to you??"
"Yeah."

I looked at him then moved his arms and walked out the kitchen.

"Kiara-"
"Next topic."
"Baby I didn't mean it like that. When I 1st met you yeah that's what I seen you as. Now you're my intelligent, gorges, funny, sarcastic, bi polar, fashionista, independent baby mama and future wife."
"I don't wanna just be your baby mama Chris I was be you're wife s*** or at least ya girl."
"Can we not do this tonight??"

I just sighed as the timer went off. My timer for waiting for Chris is going to be going off soon too.

Kiara need to stop that s*** right the f*** now. Like forreal how you gonna have a baby with Chris, go out with Tyga, then flirt with Trey. I mean s*** just give up and go to Chris.
Smh.
Run it

Keep the runs coming. Writing after my shower !

Now I love Tremaine...everybody knows that....but do I trust him for Kiara right now...no....and Chris and Tyga might as well calme de f*** down....and keep that s*** talking to zero.

I was thinking the same s*** like damn you really loving the crew
Seems like she seeking the relationship in chris' S FRIENDS that she longs for with chris the love and life she wants from chris she trying to get somewhere else
Maybe she doesnt realize how shes making herself look

And chris crazy af for letting her get with tyga and tyga wrong af for even thinking about f***ing with his homey baby moms that s*** agaist the code

Thats probably why chris aint f***ing with her because she smashing the damn homies next its gon be his cousins smh

bad b**** add right now dammit!!! i f***in loved that add!!!

so she gone get wit every celebrity that chris know huh? i think thats knda shady but hey, she just his baby mama n tyga did cheat on her smh...idk...

run it!

{ CHAPTER 22 }
{ MONTHS LATER }
I've been single for a about 7 months now and I'm fine with it. I've taken time out to find the real me and made changes in my life. My babygirl is now 5, I'm 23, and Chris is 25. Michael didn't wanna lose me completely so after about 3 months I let him be my friend again. We talk a few times a week, we take the kids out together since his son is 1 now, Chyna still doesn't like me and I could really give 2 f***s. Chris is like my guy best friend. Our relationship goes beyond just our daughter. We talk about ANY and EVERYTHINFG. We've decided to have family days every Sunday. While she's in school I'm a secretary at work which just so happens to be in the music industry. I work under Chris' new manager. My life is going nicely. No drama, only 1 kid, she's excelling in school, I've got 2 college degrees, and I'm getting money. I didn't put Chris on Child Support because he does any and everything for her plus more. Right now she's at school and I'm at work with Cassie & Jennifer. Chris, Tyga, and Trey Songz walked in.

"Damn shawty gorges."

Trey said referring to me. Both Chris and Tyga rolled their eyes while I blushed. I'm a HUGE Trey Songz fan. Always have been. I just wasn't as ride or die as I was a Chris Brown fan before.

"That's Kiara. My baby mama."
"And my ex girlfriend."
"Ohhhh that's THE Kiara. Damn ya wasn't lying about her being so .. Damn. Ya some dumbasses for letting her getaway."

Tyga and Chris both said "I know" at the same time. Trey began walking closer to the desk and I squealed a little.

"How you doing gorges??"
"I'm fine Mr. Songz how are you??"
"Please call me Tremaine. I'm doing mighty fine now that you've blessed me."

I laughed a little.

"Corny??"

He said with that hypnotic smile of his.

"Just a tad bit."

We both laughed.

"You have a sexy laugh."
"I hate my laugh, but thank you."
"You shouldn't hate anything about yourself even the little things. You're too flawless to feel insecure."

I blushed even more. He kissed my hand as he handed his phone to me. We both had the same exact phone. I bought a Galaxy s3. We both even had black and blue cases. Only difference was my screensaver was 1 of Chris, Diamond, and I professional Christmas pictures and his was him shirtless and oiled down smirking. I almsot fainted as I handed mines to him and we both smiled.

"See we're good together already."

He winked at me and I blushed again. I began putting my number in his phone.

"Save as Future Wifey."
"Why?? Is there another Kiara in ya phone??"
"You are my future wifey you just don't know it yet."

I raised an eyebrow at him slightly.

"Yeah there's a couple more Kiaras in my phone too."

He smirked as I laughed. By this time Chris was clenching his jaw and Tyga was mean mugging.

"I'll be hitting you up very soon gorges."
"Pshh you think I'll be waiting??"

I knew damn well I would be.

"You don't have to. I'll be the 1 waiting."

He winked at me and walked away. Chris and Tyga eventually followed talking s*** under their breaths.

Writing in school ..

run it

awee :c run it.

Poor baby just can't catch a break :(

I'm glad she dumped his punk ass cheating ads...big ups to Kiara for being strong enough to go thru with it...

Run it!!

run it

i almost caught myself crying . never give in to your ex when you have a good woman at home . second man that ruined their chance with a good woman . next man eon't get in so easily . question , how do you say you love someone , then cheat a day later ? baffles me . run it .