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Secluded Heart (Complete)

<a href="">Zaira</a> had everything going for her. She was excelling in her junior year at college at age 21, was involved in multiple extracurricular activities, and was madly in love with her boyfriend, <a href="">Travis</a>. Everything seemed to be perfect, that is, until she met <a href="">him</a> and he turned her world upside down.


AWWWWW Karen and Alexis are so sweet.


It’s Saturday afternoon and I am changing my clothes in the staff bathroom at Barnes and Noble. I really want to make a good impression on Julian’s mom today. I told Julian I was kind of nervous to meet her and he says I shouldn’t be nervous at all. He is sure his mom is going to like me. I just hope he is right. Julian even asked me to bring an overnight bag just in case his mom asked me to stay the night, since he will be staying the night. I change into <a href="">this outfit</a>. I want to look nice for Julian’s mom, so I didn’t want to wear my simple work clothes for when I visit her. I put my work clothes in a small bag and then I look in the mirror. I fluff out my hair so it looks like <a href="">this</a>. I gather my things and then I leave the staff bathroom. As I am walking towards the entrance of the store, I am grabbed by my waist and pulled into someone’s lap sitting in a chair. I gasp in shock and I am about to tell someone off, until I look and see Julian. He smiles and I gently hit his chest.

“Hey,” Julian said while smiling.

“Why did you just come out of nowhere like that?,” I said while frowning.

“You mad?,” Julian said while raising an eyebrow. I just shrug my shoulders and Julian looks at me then pecks my lips. He then looks me up and down and then looks back up at me and smiles. The way he looks at me makes me so nervous. I look <a href="">him</a> up and down and smile to myself. He always looks so handsome to me no matter what he wears.

“Do I look alright?,” I asked nervously.

“ look beautiful, as always....I like your hair like this,” Julian said while playing in my hair a bit.

“Thank you Julian,” I said while blushing a bit.

“You’re so still nervous about meeting my mom?”

“Yes I am....I just want her to like me.”

“I know you do and she will ok? I promise.” I just look at Julian and smile and he takes off his hood and kisses my cheek.

“...You got a haircut huh?,” I said while gently rubbing the top of Julian’s head.

“Yeah I got one earlier today. My mom doesn’t really like my scruffy look,” Julian said while laughing a bit.

“Well it looks ready to go?”

“Yeah I am. Let’s go.” I smile and nod my head and I stand up and then Julian stands up. We leave Barnes and Noble and we get in our respective cars and then I follow Julian to his mother’s house. Once we get there, we both get out of our cars. I walk over to Julian and I take a deep breath as I look at the house.

“...Did you grow up in this house?,” I asked.

“Yeah I did,” Julian said.

“It’s really nice.”

“Thanks....ready to go in?” I just look at Julian and nod my head. He smiles a bit and grabs my left hand with his right hand and pulls me closer and kisses my lips. He leads the way as we walk up the few stairs to the front door. Julian unlocks the door with his key and we both walk in. Julian closes and locks the door behind the both of us.

“Ma! Alexis!,” Julian called out. Julian’s mom comes walking out of the kitchen and I just smile at her as she smiles at both of us. Julian’s mom is beautiful.

“Hi Julian baby,” Julian’s mom said.

“Hey, this is Zaira. Zaira this is my beautiful mother,” Julian said while smiling.

“Hi Ms. Matthews, it’s very nice to finally meet you,” I said while smiling and holding out my hand.

“Oh aren’t you sweet? But call me Karen. It’s so nice to finally meet you too. And you better give me a hug!,” Karen said nicely. I just laugh and I hug Karen and she hugs me back tightly. After pulling out of the embrace, she looks me up and down and then looks back at me.

“You are very beautiful Zaira, just stunning,” Karen complimented.

“Oh thank you so much. You are beautiful as well,” I said while blushing.

“Oh thank you and no need to be shy....Julian you did very good,” Karen said. Julian laughs a bit and hugs his mom tightly, then kisses her cheek.

“Juju!,” Alexis said while running down the stairs. I just laugh a bit at Alexis’ nickname for Julian, I think it’s adorable.

“Little girl how many times am I going to tell you about that silly nickname?,” Julian asked.

“Oh be quiet and pick me up so I can give you a kiss!,” Alexis exclaimed. Julian just laughs and picks up Alexis. Alexis rests her hands on Julian’s shoulders and then kisses him all over his face, while Julian laughs a bit. Julian then hugs Alexis tight and then kisses her cheek a few times. I truly adore Julian and Alexis’ relationship. It’s the sweetest thing to me. I can tell he really loves her. He will make an excellent father someday. Why am I even thinking about that?! Alexis looks over at me and smiles big and I smile back.

“Hi Alexis how are you doing today?,” I said while gently rubbing her hand.

“I’m good’re pretty! I like your hair!,” Alexis said while giggling.

“Oh thank you and you’re pretty yourself. I like your hair too, it’s really pretty,” I complimented. Alexis is wearing her natural hair down and it falls past her shoulders. I notice her ensemble includes a cute sweater and leggings. The girl is adorable.

“Thank you. I like you you’re nice.....want to see my room?,” Alexis asked excitedly.

“Sure Alexis I would love to,” I said while smiling. Alexis smiles and Julian sets her down and I take off my boots quickly.

“Come down to the kitchen when you two are done,” Julian said. I nod my head and Alexis grabs my hand and I follow her upstairs. She leads me to <a href="">her room</a> and I just look around in awe.

“Wow Alexis this is a nice room sweetheart,” I said.

“Thank you. Uncle Juju helped me decorate it,” Alexis said.

“Aww that’s nice.....I like the nickname Juju,” I said while laughing a bit.

“Me too!! Julian doesn’t but I don’t care, I like it,” Alexis said while giggling. I nod my head and I look around Alexis’ room. I notice numerous pictures of her and <a href="">this man</a> on her dresser and nightstand next to her bed. I walk over to her nightstand and pick up a picture of Alexis and the man together and I smile. I can’t help but notice how much the man looks like Julian.

“He’s very this your dad?,” I asked.

“Yeah that’s daddy.....he looks like Juju huh?,” Alexis asked.

“Yes he really does.”

“....I miss him.”

“Oh sweetheart I bet you do.” I set down the picture back on the nightstand and walk over to Alexis and kneel down in front of her and rest my hands on her little waist and look at her and she looks at me frowning a bit.

“...You know? I know exactly how you feel Alexis. I lost my dad when I was 16. I was older than you, but I know that when you lose someone you love, it hurts. It hurts a lot....but all the good times and memories you had with your dad they won’t go away. And as long as they don’t go away, your daddy will always live. He will always be in your heart. Don’t ever forget that,” I said sympathetically. Alexis smiles a bit as she nods her head. She then wraps her arms around my neck and hugs me tight. I smile to myself and I hug her back.

“Thank you Zaira,” Alexis said.

“No problem gorgeous.....let’s go see what Uncle Julian is doing downstairs,” I said. She nods her head and pulls out of the embrace and kisses my cheek. I smile and kiss her cheek. I stand up and she takes my hand and we walk downstairs to the kitchen and we see Julian and Karen seasoning meat to grill.

“Do you two need any help?,” I asked.

“Well me and Julian are going to grill the meat.....would you like to help with the side dishes?,” Karen asked.

“I would love to. Just let me know what I need to make and I will gladly help,” I said nicely.

“Oh you’re a sweetheart.....Julian, don’t you dare let this one get away,” Karen said. Julian just laughs a bit and so do I.

“Alexis would you like to help me make the side dishes?,” I asked nicely.

“Yes I would love to!,” Alexis exclaimed. I just smile at her and I look up and see Julian smiling at me. He winks at me and I look down and blush a little bit. I don’t know why he still makes me so nervous. Maybe it’s because he is so damn fine! Ugh! I look back up at him and admire him. Gosh I’ve never seen a man so fine in my life and sometimes I can’t believe he is actually interested in me. I love his blonde hair, his nose piercing, his goatee, his lips, his smile and his freckles. And his body?! Lord don’t even let me get started! I love his tall, skinny, but built frame. I love his tattoos, they turn me on! His tattoos look so good on him!! I’m about to ruin my panties, I need to chill! Julian just....turns me on without even touching me. Just the way he looks at me turns me on and that is scary as hell! I can’t even imagine how it would be when touches me in a more sexual way, my body will be on fire!! Ok relax Zaira, just look away from Julian. I look at Karen and she smiles and sets out side dishes for me to make. I don’t mind at all since I love to cook. Karen asked me to make the salad, baked beans, rolls, and fruit salad. Karen already made deviled eggs, hush puppies, potato salad, and homemade lemonade. Karen tells me where everything is that I will need and she walks outside to the patio to start up the grill. Julian looks at me and smiles.

“I told my mom you like to cook so I hope you don’t mind any of this,” Julian asked.

“Not at all Julian I love cooking. And she isn’t asking me to do too much, so it’s fine,” I said in an assuring tone.

“....You’re so sweet. If you need anything, let me know I will be right outside.”

“Ok thank you.”

“Ok Alexis, you keep Zaira company ok?,” Julian said.

“I will Juju,” Alexis said while smiling big.

“Yeah Juju we’ll be fine,” I said. Julian raises his eyebrows at me in shock.

“Oh no, you better not start calling me that,” Julian said sternly.

“Why not? It’s cute,” I said. Julian narrows his eyes at me and I walk over to him and rest my hands on his waist.

“Awww are you mad?,” I asked sweetly.

“Yes I am. Don’t call me Juju,” Julian said stubbornly.

“I bet if I give you kiss, you won’t be mad anymore.”

“Oh yeah? Well let’s find out.” I bite my lip and stand on my toes and I give Julian a nice kiss. At the end, I sucked on his bottom lip and pulled it out. I then trace his lips slowly with my tongue. He likes it when I do that ;). Good thing Alexis was not watching us because she is too young for all of this! I just look up at him and he looks down at me as he smiles.

“I can’t stay mad at you,” Julian said.

“Good,” I said while smiling.

“Ya’ll are cute!!,” Alexis squealed. We both laugh and look at Alexis, whom is just smiling at the both of us.

“Alright, I’m going to help ma grill the meat,” Julian said. I nod my head and I kiss Julian once more and then he leaves the kitchen and goes out to the patio. I wash my hands and then I start to cut pineapples, pears, grapes, apples and strawberries for the fruit salad. Alexis washes her hand and then climbs in a chair so she is at the height of the kitchen island I am cutting the fruit on and she smiles at me and I notice her.

“You like my uncle huh?,” Alexis teased.

“...I like your uncle very much Alexis...he’s a really nice guy,” I said.

“Yes he is.”

“So you two are close huh?”

“Oh yes.....he is always there. He has been since birth he says. I love him so much.”

“And he loves you I can see that.” Alexis smiles and nods her head.

“How about once I cut the fruit, you put it in a bowl for me?,” I suggested.

“Ok!,” Alexis said. I smile and hand her a large bowl and as I cut up the fruit, she puts it in the bowl, mixing it occasionally. Alexis helps me make all of the side dishes as we talk. I love this little girl already. She is so sweet and very smart. I enjoyed getting to know her. Once the side dishes are all ready, I place them on the counter and get out the rest of the side dishes that Karen made earlier. Then, Julian comes into the kitchen.

“Ok the meat is all ready,” Julian said.

“Juju look! I helped Zaira cook!,” Alexis exclaimed.

“She sure did Julian. She was a great helper,” I said. Julian just smiles and walks over to us and kisses both of our cheeks.

“Ok Alexis go outside with grandma and see what meat you want to eat,” Julian said.

“Ok,” Alexis said. Alexis gets down from the chair and walks out to the patio. Julian looks at the food then back at me.

“This looks great Zaira...thank you so much for helping out,” Julian said.

“It’s no problem at all,” I said. I peck Julian’s lips and then we take the side dishes out to the patio and place them on the table. Julian then gets plates and utensils for everyone and I get the lemonade from the refrigerator and cups and then we go outside and start to fix our plates.

“Zaira everything looks great! Baby thank you so much for helping me out,” Karen said.

“Oh it’s no problem Karen. Thank you so much for inviting me here today. I am really enjoying myself so far,” I said kindly.

“Oh you are welcome I’m just glad you know I haven’t see Julian smile this much in I want to thank you for that....I’ve missed my son’s smile,” Karen.

“Well Karen....I really like your son....I care about him, so I have no problem making him smile,” I said while looking at Julian.

“Awwww!,” Alexis and Karen said in unison. I just laugh and Julian looks down while shaking his head. It really warms my heart to feel so welcomed by Karen and Alexis. That means a lot to me. Once we all make our plates, we sit down at the table, Karen says a blessing and then we all start eating. Julian is sitting in the chair next to me and Alexis and Karen are sitting across from us.

“Mmmm! Zaira, these baked beans are delicious! Wow!,” Karen exclaimed.

“Oh thank you so much,” I said while smiling. Julian and Alexis both try their baked beans and then look at me with a pleased look on their face.

“These are yummy!,” Alexis said.

“Yeah Zaira these are really good!,” Julian exclaimed.

“Thanks,” Zaira said while laughing a bit.

“Now Julian, Zaira is perfect. I hope you see that.....if you bring any other women home after Zaira, I am sure I won’t like them because I will always just remember Zaira....don’t you mess this up,” Karen said.

“I’m doing my best not to mom,” Julian said while looking at me. I smile at Julian and he kisses my cheek. Julian and I enjoy a nice dinner with Alexis and Karen. I can see why Julian loves them both so much, since they are both so sweet. I feel very welcome and I appreciate that. Once we are all done eating, we all help to clean up the table. Julian and Alexis go downstairs to the basement to play while Karen and I put away the food. Karen said she wanted some one-on-one time with me.

“So Zaira, where are you from originally?,” Karen asked.

“I was born and raised in Virginia Beach actually,” I said.

“Oh really that’s nice. You know....Julian told me about your parents. I am really sorry for your loss.”

“Thank you Karen. I’m sorry for you loss too....Julian told me about Justin.”

“Thank you....I miss my son but I just tell myself he’s in a better place and I know he is watching over us....I just feel so bad for Alexis sometimes. Her mom was never in her life and then her father was taken away from her.....and Julian....well he knows what he is doing is wrong, but I know he is doing it just so I won’t have to bury another son.”

“Yeah you are right about that....Julian loves you and Alexis so much. He is always talking about the both of you.....he knows what he is doing is wrong and I know he hates it....but as soon as he pays off the money he is going to quit.”

“I know that’s what he says it’s just....I worry about him every day. I tell him all the time I fear getting that call that he is dead too or even in jail....he is dealing with the same people that Justin was dealing with and that scares me so much....I pray for his safety all the and Alexis would be lost without him....that little girl needs him.”

“You’re right....he mentioned that he would like to become Alexis’ permanent guardian right?”

“Yes he really does and I love that idea....Julian really loves Alexis and I know he would do anything to provide for her and protect her.....but right now is not the time. When he gets out of this mess he is in, graduates from college and gets a job, I would love for him to be that to Alexis....I love that little girl to death and he knows that. But he also knows that I am getting older. I love him for always thinking about me.”

“He’s really sweet Karen....he definitely wasn’t like that when I first met him.”

“I know that boy comes off rude and stubborn but I surely did not raise him like that. It’s just....he’s been through a lot....and he doesn’t know who to trust...people in the past that he thought were there for him really weren’t and he’s been hurt because of that. That is why he started alienating himself from people in’s sad to me because deep down I know his heart. I know he is a good person and he knows it too.....I’m just glad he met you to teach him that again. He needs you Zaira. Please remember that.” I just look in Karen’s eyes and she smiles and I smile back and nod my head. What Karen just said really has me thinking. Julian really has been through a lot and that is why when you first meet him, he is not the most inviting person. But I know deep down that Julian wants what everyone else in this world wants, and that is to be cared for. I have no problem at all caring for Julian and teaching him how to care for others. Karen and I finish up the dishes while talking the entire time and then we go downstairs to the basement and we see Julian and Alexis lying down on the floor on their stomachs playing a board game. The time now is around 7 pm.

“Alexis honey it’s time to get ready for bed. Julian and Zaira will come say goodnight to you once you take your bath,” Karen said.

“Ok grandma,” Alexis said. Alexis kisses Julian’s cheek then walks over to Karen and holds her hand.

“Zaira you are more than welcome to stay the night,” Karen offered.

“Are you sure?,” I asked.

“Of course sweetheart,” Karen said.

“Thank you so much Karen. Do you have a guest room?,” I asked.

“Oh honey I do....but I wouldn’t mind if you shared a room with Julian. You two are grown,” Karen said while laughing a bit. I feel my cheeks turn a bit red in embarrassment.

“Oh Zaira I’m sorry I didn’t mean to embarrass you.....I know you and Julian aren’ know....but Julian tells me everything,” Karen said.

“No need to apologize Karen. I would love to stay,” I said. She smiles and nods her head and she and Alexis walk upstairs. I look at Julian and he stands up from the floor and walks over to me and wraps his arms around my waist. He leans down and starts kissing me passionately and he instantly slides his tongue inside of my mouth. I gladly accept his tongue and I play with his tongue, but then he starts sucking on my tongue! I am going to kill him for getting my panties wet! Lord help me please! I quiver a bit as he pulls me closer to him. His kisses just take me to another place. After a passionate few minute make out session, he pulls out of the kiss by sucking on my bottom lip. I just look at him in a daze. He knows exactly what he did that is why he is smirking at me!

“I’ve wanted to do that as soon as we got here.....I really like your lips,” Julian said while gently rubbing my bottom lip with his right thumb.

“I really like yours too,” I said. Julian smiles and he grabs my hand and we walk over to the couch and sit down. Julian rests his left arm over my shoulders.

“So how do you like my mom?,” Julian asked.

“Oh Julian I love your mom. She is a sweetheart. And she made me feel very welcome here today,” I said.

“I told you she would like you didn’t I?”

“Yes you did you were right Juju.” Julian just cuts his eyes at me and I just laugh.

“Oh stop, I like the name Juju it’s cute. Alexis likes it too,” I teased.

“Ok....just don’t call me that s**t in public ok?,” Julian said seriously. I just nod my head and I rest my head against his shoulder. About 30 minutes later, Karen comes to get me and Julian to say good night to Alexis. Julian and I walk hand in hand upstairs to Alexis’ bedroom along with Karen. We look in and see Alexis lying down in the bed under the covers.

“Juju and Zaira let’s read a story,” Alexis suggested.

“Ok one story, then its lights out,” Karen said. Alexis nods her head and me, Julian and Karen sit on the bed. Alexis pulls a book from her nightstand and she opens it. We all went around and read a page until the story was done. After that, Alexis hugs me and Julian tight and kisses our cheeks and then she turns on her side and closes her eyes. Julian rubs her back and gently hums as Alexis drifts off to sleep. Can Julian sing?! If he can, I am going to marry this man!! Whoa I need to chill! Once Alexis is sleeping, Julian kisses her cheek and then me, him and Karen all leave the room, as Karen closes the door behind us.

“Ok you two have a good night. I’m going to cuddle in my sheets and read my book. If you two need anything, just let me know,” Karen said.

“Ok ma. I love you,” Julian said.

“I love you too Julian,” Karen said.

“Thank you for everything today Karen, I really appreciate it,” I said.

“No problem sweetheart. Thank you for coming,” Karen said. Karen hugs Julian and I and then she goes into her bedroom closing the door behind her. I look at Julian and he looks down at me.

“You have to make your runs tonight?,” I asked.

“No I’m taking the night off. I want to spend it with you,” Julian said.

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah I’m sure.....don’t worry it’s fine. I am allowed to have a few days off every now and then....I’m going to get your bag out of the car. Let me show you my room.” Julian takes my hand and we walk down the hall to the last bedroom. He opens the door and we walk into <a href="">his room</a>.

“It’s not exactly how it was when I was growing up. I changed it around a bit so it would look more mature,” Julian said while laughing.

“I like it’s nice,” I said while sitting down on the bed.

“Thanks....I’ll be back with your bag,” Julian said. He leaves the room and comes back minutes later with my overnight bag in his hand. I stand up from the bed and he hands the bag to me. He then sets down his own overnight bag and laptop bag and then he looks at me.

“I’ll let you get dressed,” Julian said. He leaves the room closing the door behind him and I set down my bag and open it. I take off my jeans and I change my underwear and then I put on a pair of fitted yoga capris. I then take off my shirts and my bra and I put on a t-shirt. I usually don’t sleep in a bra, I wonder if Julian has ever noticed that? I put my clothes in my overnight bag and then I sit on the bed. A few minutes later, I hear a knock on the door and Julian asking if it’s ok to come in.

“Yeah come in Julian,” I said. The door opens and I see Julian with a small tray in his hand. I look and see two plates of pound cake and two glasses of milk. He sets the tray carefully down on the bed then looks at me.

“This is my mom’s homemade pound cake, I am sure you will like it,” Julian said.

“It looks great,” I said while smiling. I pick up a plate and start eating and then Julian takes off his clothes so he is wearing nothing but a pair of boxers. I have never seen him shirtless before and I felt my mouth drop a bit when I saw his exposed torso! Ahh he is too damn fine!!! I just love the way his tattoos look on his complexion. I also notice his toned arms and abs. I look away before I have to change underwear again! Julian sits next to me and starts eating his pound cake.

“How is it?,” Julian asked.

“It’s delicious. Your mom is a great cook,” I said. Julian just smiles and kisses my cheek. Once we are done with our dessert, Julian brings the tray of our dishes downstairs to the kitchen, and then comes back up to his bedroom. He closes the door behind him and goes over to the television and grabs the remote and turns it on.

“Want to watch a movie?,” Julian asked. I just nod my head and he sets up his DVD player and puts in “Coming to America.”

“This is one of my favorite movies,” Julian said.

“It’s one of mine too,” I said. I lie down in the bed and I get under the covers. Julian starts the movie, turns off the lights and walks over to the bed with the remote in his hand. He sets the remote on the nightstand and then pulls back the covers. He lies down next to me and scoots close to me. He is lying down on his back and I scoot closer to him and turn on my side facing him and he puts an arm around me while I rest my head on his chest. I love lying with Julian by my side. I just feel so safe when he is with me. Julian and I enjoy watching the movie together. We laughed together and that was really nice. I really like spending time with Julian. I want more nights like this where we can just chill, but I know those won’t come as often as I would like. I want to be patient with Julian. I need him to know that I will be by his side no matter what. He deserves that. Once the movie is over, Julian turns to a random channel and yawns. He gently pushes me so I am lying down on my back. He kisses my lips and then cuddles close to me and rests his head on my chest, but quickly jerks it away. I look at him and he looks down at my chest, well actually my boobs and I see a smirk form across his face. I already know he is a freak! Good thing it’s not cold in here!

“Mmm.....I thought I noticed you didn’t wear a bra when you sleep....I like that,” Julian teased.

“Leave me alone,” I said while pouting.

“Aww don’t pout....I’m not complaining. I’m not complaining at all,” Julian said while looking my torso up and down multiple times. I gently hit his chest and he laughs and he rests his head against my chest. I look down at him and I see him close his eyes. I smile to myself and I gently caress the top of his head. I already know I am falling for Julian and I am sure he knows it too. I just worry about him. I know I shouldn’t but the closer we get, sometimes the more I want to push him away. I’m just scared that something will happen and I will lose him. Not necessarily death, but I’m just scared that he is scared too. We both have been through a lot and we both have issues that could hold us back. I don’t want to be scared though. I care about him and I just need to show him that. But I can also love him, and I just hope he allows me to do so.


Aww Ju Ju lol. Julians falling hard for Zaira yay. And I love that his mom notices the change and wants to meet Zaira just by her hearing the good things Juju says about her. Antonios a scary looking nigga. I can't wait till Julian gets out the game. Alexis is too cute she loves her uncle to death. I'm surprised he showed up to Zairas again but Im glad he did. They're gonna have something special just wait and see. RUN IT!!!

AWWWWW!!! Julian is falling for her!!! He's finally accepting his feelings a lil bit. I'm glad for him. I'm glad he has someone like Zaira. I hope she feels the same, yea its early in the game, but I hope they both win.



Once we get to Zaira’s stop, I get off the bus with her and I walk her up to her apartment. Once we get to her door, she turns to look at me and she smiles.

“Thanks for making sure I got home safely Julian,” Zaira said.

“It’s no problem at all,” I said.

“Well I know you have to get you want something to eat before you go? I can cook something real quick,” Zaira offered. Damn she sure is sweet.

“No that’s ok, I will just pick up something while I’m out,” I said.

“Ok.....well....if you want you can come over again tonight once you are done....I really like your company Julian,” Zaira said.

“Are you sure? It’s going to be so late.”

“I know that Julian but I don’t care. I want you to come if you want to. I’ll leave my phone on and you call me when you are at my door ok?” I just nod my head and smile and Zaira smiles back. Zaira put her number in my phone this morning while I was sleep. She thinks she’s slick ;). She moves closer to me and hugs me and then I kiss her cheek.

“I’ll see you later,” I said.

“ careful,” Zaira said. She kisses my cheek and then walks into her apartment closing the door behind her. I leave her apartment and I head to mine. I get changed in my all black ensemble, including my gun and then I leave. I have to stop by to see Antonio so I can get my product and I will be paying him some money as well. I get in my car and head out to the other side of the city, to a deserted area, which is where Antonio’s warehouse is. After my brother Justin was killed, he had to move his warehouse. I hate this s**t so much. I would much rather be spending time with Zaira right now. Damn I really like her. This s**t is scary. As I am driving, I feel my phone vibrate. I look and see it’s my mom calling. I smile and press the “accept” button and put my phone to my ear.

“Hey ma,” I said.

“Uncle Julian it’s me!,” Alexis said while giggling.

“Little girl why are you still up? It’s past your bedtime,” I said while smiling to myself. This little girl is my heart.

“I know but I wanted to hear your voice Juju,” Alexis said while giggling. Juju is Alexis’ nickname for me. She thinks it’s cute, but I don’t.

“What have I told you about calling me that?,” I asked.

“Oh whatever you love it because you love me!,” Alexis exclaimed.

“Mmmm yeah whatever I don’t know who lied and told you that,” I joked.

“Hey! That’s not nice! I love you!,” Alexis said.

“I know baby girl I am only joking. I love you too baby girl,” I said. I make kissing noises into the phone and Alexis giggles and does the same.

“Ok baby girl you need to go to sleep it’s late,” I said.

“I know I am in bed now. I just wanted to say hi and I love you,” Alexis said.

“I love you too Alexis. Please put grandma on the phone,” I said.

“Ok bye Uncle Julian!”

“Bye baby girl.” I hear a bit of shuffling, then my mom’s voice.

“Hey baby,” my mom said.

“Hey ma how are you?,” I said.

“I’m good. How about you?”

“I’m ok ma.”

“How are things with Zaira? Did you apologize to her?” I love how she just went straight for that.

“Yes ma’am I did....and she forgave me. She’s really sweet.”

“Oh she sounds sweet....I want to meet her. I know she is only your friend, but you have barely even mentioned a woman’s name until her you know.”

“I know’re right.....she’s just different....last night I went to apologize to her at like 1 in the morning. I know it was late, but I just felt the need to....and she wasn’t mad at all and she...she’s just so caring and kind. She invited me to stay the night just because she wanted me near I did.”

“Awwwww! My future daughter-in-law sounds amazing!,” my mom exclaimed.

“Ma!!,” I exclaimed in shock.

“I’m sorry know I just want to see you haven’t been happy in a while Julian so I want this for and Alexis are going to have barbecue on Saturday around 4. Alexis loves grilled food she has been asking for grilled hot dogs and hamburgers for weeks now....but anyway, ask Zaira if she will come with you. I want to meet her Julian.”

“Ma are you sure?”

“Of course I’m sure baby....I need to meet the woman that has my son sprung.”

“Ma I’m not sprung!,” I said defensively.

“The way you said that just proved it,” my mom said while laughing. I just sigh; she is right. Zaira has me way past sprung though. She has me feeling like we are a couple.

“....Ok...I will ask her tonight,” I said.

“Ok baby. Let me know what she says. Will you be coming Saturday?,” my mom asked.

“Of course I will be there.”

“Ok baby. Well I’ll let you go. I love you Julian.”

“I love you too mom. Give my baby girl a good night kiss for me.”

“I will careful.”

“I will. Bye.”

“Bye baby.” I hang up and put my phone back in my pocket. Once I get to my destination, I get out of my car and go inside the warehouse. I take a few turns here and there and knock on a door. The door opens and I see <a href="">Antonio</a> smoking a cigarette. He moves to the side and I walk in and he closes the door behind me. I look at him and I pull out the stack of money in my pocket and hand it out to him. He just looks at me and I look back at him. This n***a is intimidating as s**t, but I can’t let him see the fear in me! He snatches the stack from me and he takes the rubber band off of it and quickly counts the money. He then looks at me in surprise.

“Damn I see you stepped your game up huh? You made $1,000 in a little over a month?,” Antonio asked.

“Yeah. Now only $3,000 left,” I said nonchalantly.

“Yeah you’re right.....then you’re out for good huh?”

“Yeah that’s it.”

“Alright once you pay your debt, that’s fine with me....your stash is ready.” I nod my head and then I walk over to my stash and grab it. I then leave without saying anything else to Antonio. I can’t stand Antonio, but I can’t let him know that. As a matter of fact I hate him because he killed my brother. I can’t say for sure if he was the one to pull the trigger, but he sure as hell planned it. I just try and keep my distance and do my job. I know Antonio could knock the wind out of me with one punch, so I try to stay on his good side. Anyway, I get in my car and make my runs. I do get a bite to eat as I am driving around. It was a long and slow night. I only made $80 tonight, that s**t is wack. It’s going to seem like a lifetime to pay off this last $3,000. Some days are booming, while others just aren’t. No way will I make $1,000 this month like I did last month. I just try and make the best of things. I just try to imagine the future without dealing with this s**t. I see myself getting a job once I graduate from college with a Bachelor’s degree and making an honest living. S**t I even see Zaira with me, now that’s crazy. Anyway, by 2:30 am I’m all done, and I’m so tired. I just want to pass out. I drive to Zaira’s apartment and once I get there, I park. I put my gun and the rest of my stash in my glove compartment and I lock it. I then get out of the car and I close and lock the doors behind me. I pull out my phone and call Zaira as I walk up to her apartment. She answers after the third ring.

“Hey,” Zaira said tiredly.

“Hey I’m outside,” I said.

“Ok I’m coming,” she said. I hang up and I wait outside of her door and her door opens within seconds. She smiles when she sees me and I smile back. I look her up and down and she is wearing a t-shirt and yoga pants and she still looks good enough to eat! Mmm! She grabs my hand and I walk in and she closes and locks the door behind me. She wraps her arms around me and hugs me and I hug her back. She then kisses my cheek and holds my hand as we walk into her bedroom. She lies down in the bed as I get undressed so I just have on my underclothes. I yawn as I lie down next to her. She turns on her side to face me and I turn on my side to face her. Zaira scoots closer to me and I just look at her. She gently rubs my left cheek with her hand, which gives me chills. Her touch is so gentle and so caring. I like it.

“You look exhausted Julian,” Zaira said softly.

“I am....I need to ask you something though,” I said.

“Sure what is it?”

“Well....I talked to my mom earlier tonight and well....she really wants to meet you. She and Alexis are going to have a barbecue and grill on Saturday at around 4. Will you come with me? I’m not sure what your work schedule is, so it’s okay if you can’t.”

“I’m working an earlier shift 9-3 on Saturday, so I can go. I would love to meet your mom Julian. And see your gorgeous little niece again.”

“Yeah she can’t wait to meet you. I’m sure Alexis will like to see you again too. So how about I meet you at work at 3, then you can follow me to my mom’s house.”

“That sounds great Julian. I can’t wait.” I can’t help but smile at Zaira, she is such a sweetheart. Zaira moves closer to me and drapes her arm around my waist and I do the same to her.

“I really can’t thank you enough for standing up for me to Travis today....I really appreciate it,” Zaira said.

“That’s no problem Zaira. He just needs to let you go,” I said.

“I know he know.....when you held me by my waist....I can’t explain to you how good that felt to made me feel I was yours,” Zaira said while looking into my eyes.

“....I’m not sure why I did that,” I said honestly.

“....Do you regret it?”

“No.” Damn I answered that question fast. Zaira just smiles at me and I try to hide my smile back. Zaira leans in and gently pecks my lips. She reaches behind her and turns off her light and then turns back to me. The curtains are slightly open so there is still a bit of light in the room and I can see her face. She is staring at me and I am staring back. Zaira smiles a bit and lightly brushes my lips with her fingertips. Damn!!! Zaira’s touch turns me on so much, my d**k is rising by the second! Why does she do this to me?!

“Let’s get some sleep Julian,” Zaira whispered. I just nod my head and she leans in and pecks my lips, then kisses my forehead. She closes her eyes and I do the same. There isn’t a place I rather be in the world right now, than lying right here next to Zaira. I might as well admit it; I’m falling for Zaira. And you know what? That’s just fine with me.

Julian is sooo great. I'm glad he stood up for her. It shows that he's willing to put himself on the line for her. I love how Zaria doesn't judge Julian. it shows that she's really just interested in him, not his job or what he does. I love these two. And Lisa is soo dumb. The nigga she f***ing is so worried about his ex, why are you following him around being his lil ho?!! Like they both are just idiots. He wanted someone to f*** so bad, now he got her. smh Run it!!

Zaira and Julian are too cute :)

run it

Julian and Zee are beautiful together.
Lisa is stupid! The boy she sleeping with is still tryna get back with his ex
Ain't that saying to her that she ain't wanted!?

YES BISCH, thats what Im talking bout get em Zaira lol. Too shocked he showed up to her house so late at night to apologize, any other female Julian wouldnt've have even cared if she was okay after he left. Aww. And the fact she was in a tank and booty shorts when he was at the door, made him extra hard lol. But Im glad they talked, glad he opened up and told her about his brother. Glad he showing a different side. Them kissing again, and he not wanting to leave her house is so sweet, Im glad she made him stay and it was sweet they slpet in the same bed, and he staired at her as she slept. Zaira's ass know she came out in that towel all wet all purpose, and she sure got a rise outta Julian's ass lol. I loved when they got to lunch and he defended her from Travis esp. when he put his arm around her waist like "yeah nigga she mine" lol. Travis better step off for he get hurt... I hope he comes back over after hes done with his runs. Aww. I love them already. Zaira's changing him for the good. And his mamma wants to meet her already, thats TO SWEET. RUN IT!!!

I love this story!!!
Run it!!!

Love it! Love it! LOVE IT! Julian is my dude man. It was second nature to respond the way he did which was hella dope on his part. The way he took up for her says a lot about how he feels about her. RUN IT!


I wake up the next day, Thursday morning at around 9:30 am. I open my eyes slowly and look next to me and I don’t see Zaira. I sit up in the bed and stretch as I yawn. Suddenly the bathroom door opens and I look at Zaira and I am sure my mouth involuntarily dropped to the floor. Zaira has a towel wrapped around her body and her wet hair is resting against her shoulder. Lord I just want to rip her towel off. I look away before she sees me staring, but damn she looks good!! Her body, ugh I want it so bad!! I really need to relax.

“Good morning Julian,” Zaira said.

“Uh....good morning Zaira,” I said while turning back to look at her.

“Did you sleep ok last night?”

“Yeah I slept great actually.”

“Great huh?,” Zaira said while sitting next to me.

“Yeah,” I said while moving away from her.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing...I should get going, I have class at 11.”

“Oh me too.....can I see you again today? Do you have any breaks between classes?”

“Yeah...I’m done for the day at 3:20. I usually go to the library at that time.”

“Oh that’s the same for me....we can get something to eat then go to the library. Would that be ok?”

“That honestly sounds great Zaira. I would like that.” Zaira just smiles at me and she leans in and kisses my cheek. I look at her then peck her lips and she bites her lips afterwards. That s**t turns me on so much.

“I should get going and let you get ready....I’ll meet you at the dining hall at 3:30,” I said.

“Ok,” Zaira said while smiling. She stands up from the bed and holds her towel close. Lord I want to rip that s**t off of her so bad. She has no clue what she is doing to me and it doesn’t help that I wake up hard every morning anyway. I stand up from the bed and I quickly put my clothes back on. I notice Zaira looking me up and down from the side of my eye and I smile a bit. Once I’m dressed, Zaira walks me to the door and we look at each other.

“I’ll see you at 3:30,” I said.

“Ok Julian,” Zaira said. She moves closer to me and opens her arms. I smile a bit and hug her tight, wishing that damn towel would just fall off! After the embrace, Zaira rests her hands on my waist and I lean down and peck her lips.

“Bye,” Zaira said.

“Bye,” I said. I leave Zaira’s apartment and she closes and locks the door behind me. I am trying so hard not to smile right now, but s**t why front? Zaira makes me smile. Does that mean she makes me happy? Naw it can’t mean that could it? It’s obvious I am not use to this s**t at all. I get in my car and then I head to my apartment. Once I get there, I brush my teeth, wash my face, shower, and then I get dressed. I eat a quick breakfast then I head to class. I couldn’t get Zaira out of my mind all day, no matter how hard I tried. I just want to see her again. I’m losing it. I haven’t felt this way about a woman....ever. I had one serious relationship in high school, but that was years ago. Ever since then, I haven’t had a serious relationship. Don’t get me wrong though, I still get p***y, I mean I do still have needs. But it’s been a while since I have gotten any of that as well. As crazy as it sounds, I’m not even thinking about anyone but Zaira right now. F**k! I still am concerned about this situation though. I don’t want her to get hurt. She is too good for that. I can’t even believe myself right now, this isn’t like me at all. I try to focus during my class, but I fail miserably; I think about Zaira all day. I’m so happy when my class ends at 3:20. I quickly gather my things and head towards the dining hall. I can’t wait to see Zaira’s gorgeous face. Yeah she has me all the way open! Once I get there, I look around and see Zaira sitting at a table. I can’t help but smile when I see her. I walk over to her table and she looks up at me and smiles big.

“Hi Julian,” Zaira said.

“Hi Zaira,” I said. I set down my bag and Zaira stands up and she moves closer to me and hugs me. I smile a bit and hug her back. I pull out of the short embrace and then I look down at Zaira. She smiles at me and she stands on her toes and kisses my left cheek a few times and I for some reason I just laughed a bit while she did this.

“Let’s go get some food....I’m starving!,” Zaira exclaimed. I nod my head and Zaira turns around and standing right there is Travis, with Lisa close behind him. Zaira just backs into me, and I put my right arm around her waist and I hold her. I have no clue what possessed me to do this, but it’s done now! I am already regretting this though because just feeling Zaira this close to me has me hard!!

“So this the n***a that got you trippin’ huh Zaira?,” Travis said while looking me up and down evilly.

“Travis leave us alone,” Zaira said.

“You rather be with this clown than me Zaira huh?!,” Travis said while getting in Zaira’s face. Oh hell no!! This n***a has my blood boiling!! I put my hand up to Travis and push him back away from Zaira.

“N***a what did I tell you huh? You got a problem with Zaira, you got a problem with me and you do not want a problem with a n***a like me,” I said through clenched teeth.

“N***a I ain’t scared of you!,” Travis boasted.

“Oh I recall differently when I showed you my gun,” I teased.

“Man whatever! I’m talking to Zaira, not you!,” Travis said while raising his voice.

“No you’re talking to me now....why don’t you and your ho go somewhere else?,” I said.

“Ho? N***a you don’t know me!,” Lisa said angrily.

“Oh yeah? You slept with another woman’s man, that makes you a ho b***h,” I said rudely.

“Maybe if the b***h would have put out, I wouldn’t have to!,” Lisa said.

“B***h please you put out for anything with a d**k. Now....don’t you dare call Zaira out of her name again.....I can take care of your a** to,” I warned.

“I dare you to put your f**kin’ hands on me!,” Lisa yelled.

“I wouldn’t dare put my hands on a nasty b***h like you....just know this. Don’t mess with Zaira, because you will regret it. You too n***a. That’s a promise. Move on already, because Zaira clearly has,” I said intensely. Travis just sucks his teeth and looks at Zaira and then grabs Lisa’s hand and leaves. Zaira sighs and she turns around in my arms and I wrap my other arm around her waist and look down at her. She is biting her lip and smiling at me. I wish she would stop that s**t!

“What? Why are you looking at me like that?,” I asked nervously.

“You stood up for me Julian...thank you....I think I’m getting through to you huh?,” Zaira said.

“I could not just stand here and let that n***a and that ho talk about don’t deserve that s**t,” I said.

“Awww you’re so sweet Julian!,” Zaira squealed.

“Alright don’t do that s**t,” I said while laughing a bit. Zaira just smiles at me and I glare at her a bit. She is making me uncomfortable since I don’t put my feelings out there the way I do with her. What is happening to me?

“Let’s go get some food,” I said. Zaira nods her head and she kisses my cheek. I let go of her waist and she leads the way to the food. I just smile as I follow her; all I do is smile around her now! Ugh! Anyway, we make our trays of food and then sit down across from each other and start eating. We talk every now and then and I just watch Zaira as she eats. She even looks beautiful eating and I sound like a punk right now. Zaira has this effect on me that no other person has, but it scares me. It scares me so bad. I just sigh and I continue watching Zaira eat. I notice how healthy she eats. She has water to drink, a plate of hot food, but also a plate full of at least four fruits. Lord knows my mind went straight to the gutter. She eats all these fruits, these sweet fruits, so she must be sweet as well. Damn I want to taste her. I want to taste her so bad. I want to stick my tongue so deep inside of her that she will be clawing at my head to get me to stop. Damn!!! I need to relax! We are a while from all of that. I definitely do not want to treat her like one of these hoes I call when I want to f**k. I need to be patient. I don’t want to be like her ex n***a and I know I’m nothing like him. I’m thinking I can wait until she is ready, which could take some time since she is still recovering from the rape. I still can’t believe that happened to her. That s**t makes me sick to my stomach. Not her, the n***a that did that to her. B***h a** n***a. And how could her ex say that she was damaged goods because she was raped? That’s foul. If anything, that loose p***y b***h he is hanging with is damaged goods. Zaira is far from damaged and if I ever get the opportunity, I will prove that to her. Damn I really like her, like I genuinely like Zaira. This is crazy, but I just have to see where this goes. I can’t hold back. Zaira came into my life for a reason and I need to give her a chance. It’s the least I can do since Zaira put up with my rudeness, but still wanted to get to know me. That says a lot about her, but I want to learn more. I want to learn everything about her. Anyway, once Zaira and I finished eating, we made our way to the library. We found a table on the first floor and we both took out our laptops and books and got to work. I noticed how focused Zaira is on her work and I admire that. I admire that a lot. Zaira seems strong to me. She has been through some things, but she hasn’t let that change her. She’s not bitter and still manages to smile. Maybe she can teach me how she does that. By 7:30 pm, my phone is blowing up. I need to make my runs. I close my books, shut down my laptop and start to pack my bag.

“You have to go?,” Zaira asked.

“Yeah....I have to make my runs,” I said.

“Oh ok....are you taking the bus home?”

“Yeah....come with me. I want to make sure you get in alright.” Zaira just smiles at me and nods her head. She gathers her things as well and we leave the library. We go to the bus stop and we made it just in time for when the bus arrived. We get on and take our seats in the back next to each other.

“Julian....I really like spending time with you....I hope we can make it a habit,” Zaira said sweetly.

“......I would like that Zaira.....thanks for being so understanding about all of this.....most people I come across don’t get it,” I said.

“I’m not most people Julian....I can prove that to you.” I just look at Zaira and she smiles at me. She’s so amazing and perfect; what did I do to deserve her? That doesn’t even matter, all that matters is that she’s here now and hopefully she is here to stay.

I'm glad Julian FINALLY came to his senses! Run It!

Run it

Yayyy they are finally starting their friendship/relationship lol. Julian's shyness is so cute.

Awwww they are finally going to be friends or more, whatever they're something!!! I'm glad Julian apologized and they put their feelings out there. Zaira is so sweet and Julian is so cute and kinda shy. I like them together already. Run it!!

Awwww yay they finally nice to say other this is awesome I'm glad he apologized that's so cute and I'm glad they are so honest with each other because a lot of people aren't honest and as open as them they are made to be together and I wonder what Travis gone say when he hears about this


I feel awful for how I just left Zaira the way I did two days ago. It’s just she called me out and I wasn’t expecting that. Still, that’s no reason for me to act the way I did. She has to think I’m a complete a**hole. I still can’t believe that her dad was a drug dealer. That’s crazy. And she mentioned her mom died as well. That’s really sad to me. I never knew my dad, but my mom has always been there for me. She is my rock. I wouldn’t know what to do if I ever lost her. I wonder if Zaira has any other family, like siblings, grandparents, aunts or uncles. It would be really sad if she was just all alone. I talked to my mom about my situation and she said I was dead wrong for how I reacted. She said if anything Zaira would be a great person to have in my life since she somewhat understands my situation. She knows that I would like to have someone special in my life and she thinks Zaira is perfect. She already wants to meet her! I have told my mom about everything I have been with Zaira and she likes her already. It’s crazy to me, but that’s my mom. Anyway, I really do feel the need to apologize to Zaira. It’s Wednesday, and I have been hoping to run into Zaira all day on campus, but I haven’t. I want to see her so we can talk. I hope she can forgive me or at least give me a chance to explain why I reacted the way I did. Since I didn’t run into Zaira on campus today, I decide to talk to her after I finish my runs. It may be late, but I need to get this off of my chest as soon as I can. I finish my runs a little earlier tonight, at around 1 am. As soon as I am done, I drive to Zaira’s apartment. I doubt she is even awake. Should I wake her up? I really need to talk to her though; this situation is driving me crazy. I park my car and turn it off and I take a deep breath. I get out of my car, lock it, then I walk up the stairs to Zaira’s apartment. I take another deep breath and then I knock on the door a few times. After a minute, I notice a light turn on. Then the door opens, and I see Zaira wiping her eyes, wearing just a white beater and a pair of black booty shorts. Damn she looks good.

“Julian....what are you doing here? Are you alright?,” Zaira asked. Damn this girl must have a heart of gold. She’s not even mad that I woke her up in the middle of the night. She is more worried about me than herself. Wow.

“....I’m sorry to come unannounced and late like this but....I need to talk to you Zaira....can I please come in?,” I asked hesitantly.

“Yeah come in,” Zaira said. She moves to the side and I walk in and she closes and locks the door behind me and she turns to look at me.

“Can I get you anything? A drink maybe?,” Zaira asked.

“No thanks....let’s sit down,” I said. She nods her head and she sits down on the couch and I sit next to her and turn towards her.

“....Zaira, I’m sorry for how I reacted on called me out and I wasn’t expecting it....but everything you said was right Zaira. It was all right,” I said while sighing.

“ lost your brother because of drugs?,” Zaira asked. I just nod my head slowly and she moves closer to me and looks at me.

“I’m so sorry Julian. I’m sorry you lost your brother like that....did....did you see it happen?,” she asked.

“No....when I got was too late,” I said while looking down.

“I’m so sorry....tell me what happened.” I shake my head while still looking down.

“ can talk to me,” she said kindly. I just look at her and she smiles a bit. She moves closer to me and then she gently rubs my left arm. I take a deep breath and look her in her eyes.

“Well.....about eight months ago, my brother was set up. This n***a named Mario stole $2,000 worth of drugs from our supplier Antonio. When Antonio found out, I guess Mario got scared and didn’t want to get caught. So he paid a visit to my brother Justin and hid the drugs in his apartment. Mario then went and told Antonio that Justin was the one that stole the drugs. So Antonio came to my brother’s apartment and took him to his warehouse and killed him.....beat him then shot him to death.....I went to the warehouse and I found my brother’s body. I held him....and I screamed as loud as I brother was my best friend. And he had a daughter. That little girl was his everything. I’m so thankful that Alexis was staying with my mom the night this happened because if I would have lost her too, I would have lost my mind....but while I was at the warehouse Antonio came and threatened to kill me. I did not want to die and I knew he wanted his money back so I said I would pay him back the $2,000. But he said he wanted interest so he wanted $8,000 instead. It’s so f**ked up that I have to pay back all this money that I don’t even owe. That n***a Mario disappeared right after Justin died.....I’ve only paid back half and it’s take me eight months, so it’s going to take that long to get the I’m stuck. Antonio and his helpers threaten me all the time just because they’s f**ked still like me now Zaira?,” I said while fighting back tears. She is just looking at me with tears in her eyes.

“Oh Julian....the way you lost your brother is so sad. I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry....and it’s not fair at all that you are paying money that you don’t even owe. That’s not fair at all,” Zaira said as tears rolled down her cheeks.

“....Don’t cry over me Zaira,” I said. I gently wipe her tears and she just stares at me as I do so.

“Julian...believe it or not.....we have a lot more in common than you think.....when my dad was killed.....the killers made me and my mom watch.....we’re lucky we made it out alive,” Zaira confessed. I just stare at her in shock. We really do have a lot in common. This just confirms that I met Zaira for a reason.

“Oh Zaira, I am so sorry. I’m so sorry,” I said sympathetically. I move closer to her and wrap my arms around her waist and I pull her close. She wraps her arms around my neck and rests her head on my shoulder. I gently rub her back as she cries a bit.

“It’s ok Zaira, it’s ok,” I said softly. I hear her settle down and she pulls her face back, but it’s still close to mine. She looks me in my eyes and I wipe her tears again. She bites her bottom lip gently and leans closer to me while closing her eyes. I can’t let this happen again. I just can’t. I grab her arms and back away and she looks at me confused.

“What’s wrong?,” Zaira asked.

“Zaira....I can’t,” I said.

“Why not?”

“Zaira.....I just can’ deserve someone better than me.”

“...How can you say that about yourself?”

“Zaira.....if we were to be anything, friends or a couple, I would be the worst friend or boyfriend to you.....I would never be around. If you wanted me to come over at night to chill or just spend time with you, I couldn’t. I’m on call all night.....I couldn’t take you out like on a date or anything like that. We would never get to spend quality time together.”

“I don’t care Julian.”

“How can you not care about that Zaira?”

“Compared to my last boyfriend, you would be better. You came all the way here at 1 in the morning just so you could apologize to me and we aren’t even together. Travis wouldn’t even spend one night with me. I would be able to see you during the day and that would be fine with me. I wouldn’t care if you came over to visit me at 2 in the morning. You could fall asleep I wouldn’t even long as you are in my presence, that is all I care about.” Wow, I just don’t understand this woman.

“.....I don’t understand you,” I said softly.

“Well understand this.....I like you Julian. And I don’t care about your job....I care about you....I can be understanding when it comes to all of this.....but don’t you want to quit? Don’t you want out of this life?,” Zaira asked.

“Of course I do....once I pay back this money I am out for good. I made a promise to myself. I want to take care of my baby girl Alexis. I have wanted for a while now to become her legal guardian, but I can’t when I am doing what I am doing. I have to make sure she is safe. Hopefully by the time I graduate, I can take care of her. My mom already raised her kids and she’s getting older, so I just want to take care of my mom and Alexis...they’re my everything,” I confessed.

“Oh Julian that’s so’re so sweet.” I just put my head down and move my hands from Zaira’s arms and rest them on her waist. She lifts my head up with two fingers and we look at each other.

“Julian....I need to know what you are feeling....if you really don’t want us to be anything, then I could try and understand.....but for me, I know that I like you. That kiss confirmed my feelings for you and you said it meant something to you too Julian,” Zaira said.

“It really did.....I’ve never experienced a kiss like that before.....Zaira, I’m not use to this s**t at all....I don’t get close to people....especially women.....when people find out about what I do, they all run off.....I can’t have that again Zaira. I’m sick of if we do this....if we see where we can go....can I count on you? Can I really count on you to be there no matter what happens? Even if things get bad, will you be there for me?,” I asked.

“You can count on me me.” I just stare Zaira in her eyes and I can tell she is sincere. If I ever get the chance to call Zaira mine, I swear I will never let her go. She’s perfect. She moves closer to me and moves her hands so they are resting gently against my face.

“.....I want to kiss you,” Zaira said while studying my lips. I look down at her lips as I lightly wet mine. I see her bite her lip and smirk a little bit.

“So kiss me then,” I whispered. F**k what is she doing to me?! Zaira looks me in my eyes then back at my lips. I watch her close her eyes and then I close mine. I pucker my lips and lean in closer until I feel Zaira’s lips against mine. Damn her lips are soft! They feel so good against mine. I turn my head to the side and open my mouth and Zaira instantly darts her tongue inside of my mouth. She finds my tongue and starts playing with mine. Damn I love her tongue. I wouldn’t mind feeling it on every inch of my body, along with her lips. S**t my d**k is hard already! But I don’t want to stop kissing Zaira. Why does she make me feel like this? She has no idea what I want to do to her right now. I just want to lay her down and find out how deep she is! F**k! I need to stop this. I hardly know this woman and thoughts of her are overtaking my mind. Zaira moves her hands to my neck and then the back of my head and gently caresses the back of my head as we kiss. I want to stop this, but I can’t. We tongue wrestle for about a minute until Zaira stops the kiss, in a way that made me want to f**k her brains out! She bite on my bottom lip as she pulled out of the kiss, then she licked my bottom lightly with her tongue. I just look out in a daze after she did this. Damn!!!! Why did she do that s**t? I’m going to go to sleep hard as f**k tonight. I just look at her and she has a worried look across her face.

“....Did I do something wrong? You were kind of a in a daze,” Zaira asked.

“Huh? I’m fine. Sorry,” I said quickly. She smiles a bit and nods her head and studies my face. She gently caresses my left cheek and I just look at her.

“What is it?,” I asked.

“...You’re just so handsome,” she complimented. I just look down and I feel my cheeks turn red. She makes me so nervous for some reason.

“Aww that’s cute you’re blushing,” Zaira teased. I look up at her and I can’t help but smile! This is the first time I have fully smiled in front of her. She is just staring at me in a daze now.

“Wow....Julian...your smile is beautiful,” Zaira noticed.

“.....You’re too nice,” I said softly.

“Can’t tell you how many times I have heard that before,” Zaira said while laughing. I laugh a bit too and Zaira just smiles at me. I purse my lips closed and then I stand up and Zaira stands up as well.

“I should really get’s late and we have class tomorrow,” I said.

“...Do you have to go?,” Zaira asked softly. I just look at her in shock; does she want me to stay with her? Because I will if she asks me! Why am I so excited right now?! I need to chill!

“Huh?,” I asked.

“I’m sorry that was really forward and out of line.....I just like your company Julian,” Zaira said honestly. I just nod my head and walk to the door. I put my hand on the doorknob, but for some reason I can’t turn it to open the door. I look back at Zaira and she looks at me.

“....Do you want me to leave?,” I asked hesitantly.

“No.....I want you to stay,” Zaira said.

“ want me to take the couch this time? I wouldn’t mind.” Zaira just shakes her head and she walks over to me grabs my hand away from the doorknob and pulls me closer to her. She rests her hands on my waist and stands up on her toes and pecks my lips. She grabs both of my hands and then leads me to her bedroom. What is happening? I know I’m not about to get any p***y right now, it is way too soon. And Zaira is worth way more than a quick f**k! What?!? I can’t believe my own thoughts right now!!! Once we are in the bedroom, she turns to look at me.

“You’re already here....and I don’t want you to leave,” Zaira said.

“....Are you sure about this though? I want share the bed?,” I said.

“I just want you next to me,” Zaira said softly. For some reason the way she said that, turned me on so much! Oh lord how am I supposed to lie next to her without wanting to try something?! I’m not so sure about this.

“....Are you sure?,” I asked uneasily.

“...If you don’t want to stay, you don’t have you want to leave?,” Zaira asked me. I just look down and she moves closer to me.

“I don’t know what it is about you’re making me do and feel things that I have never done or felt before,” Zaira said. I just look up at her and she smiles a bit at me.

“Come on get comfortable,” Zaira said. I just nod my head and I slip off my shoes and jacket. I usually just sleep in my boxers, but I don’t think that is an option tonight. I take off my shirt and pants so I just have on my beater and boxers. Zaira looks me up and down and I notice her bite her lip. She must like what she sees and she is not the only one. Zaira is beyond sexy to me; she doesn’t have to do much to turn me on, which is crazy and scary at the same time. Zaira lies down in her bed on her back and looks at me. She pulls back the covers for me and pats the spot next to her.

“Come on.....and don’t look so scared,” Zaira teased. I don’t why I’m scared or nervous!! I take a deep breath and I walk over to the bed and I lie down in the bed, but not very close to Zaira. She smiles a bit and she turns off the light. She turns on her side to face me and she leans closer and gently kisses my cheek.

“Good night Julian,” Zaira said.

“Good night Zaira,” I said. I notice her close my eyes from my peripheral vision and I turn my head to look at her. She’s so damn beautiful. She really has me open and that s**t scares me beyond measure. Once I notice her in a deep sleep, I turn on my side to face her. I can’t stop looking at her. I gently rub her right cheek and then I rest my left arm on her waist. I just hope and pray this isn’t a mistake.

Damn they got a lot more in common than I would have ever imagined. Julian just needs to get his head around things and needs to realise that Zaira is honest when she says she does not care about what he does.

If she knew what it is that he does for a living and she still likes him, he needs to understand that she truly likes him, not for the "job" but for his demeanour.

And they were finally getting somewhere, dammit Julian why'd you go back in your shell after Zaria called you out? Ugh. And dammit Zaria whyd you have to call him out like that. They both better fix this, I want them together, that kiss meant too much to the both of them to just let go. Angelas a mess, goofy ass. She wants Julian and Zaira together too huh, lmao she said she get Cameron to beat Travis's ass lol. RUN IT!!!!

JULIAN!!!!!!!!! OMG!! He gets on my nerves!! He moves 2 steps forward and manages to move 4 back. I hope he apologizes to Z soon. Its obvious that they like each other. He shouldn't let what he's forced into doing make his decisions for him!! I'm kinda glad Z called him out on it. At least now he has to face it, her and his feelings. Run it!!


It’s been three days since me and Julian kissed. That I have no words for it honestly. I just know that I have not been able to stop thinking about his lips. His soft, luscious, pink lips...mmm! When he pulled away, I didn’t want him to stop. I wanted to kiss him forever. His kiss gave me chills and he got me so wet! I couldn’t believe just a two minute kiss turned me on so much! I went to sleep so sexually frustrated which hardly ever happens to me. Not even Travis could turn me on like that and he was my boyfriend, so it’s kind of scary that someone I barely know could do that to me. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about him ever since. He really saved me Friday night and I am so grateful for that. He actually seems very sweet. When he held me, I wanted to melt in his arms and never let go. I want to see him again so bad. I was hoping that I would see him at work again on Saturday, but I didn’t. Maybe today I will. Well it’s Monday morning and I am sitting across from Angela in the dining hall, eating breakfast.

“Girl what happened to you Friday night? You only texted me saying you got a ride home....I know you didn’t leave with Travis’ b***h a**,” Angela said.

“No of course not....actually Julian gave me a ride home,” I said.

“What?! Are you serious?! Girl tell me everything!,” Angela exclaimed.

“Well I was outside talking to Travis....he was just saying all this bull like how Lisa was so good in bed and how she went out of her way to please him and blah blah blah. I tell him that’s fine and good for him because I am over him and I don’t want anything to do with him anymore.....and then.....he slapped me across my left cheek.”

“What? Oh hell no! That n***a slapped you? Oh no I will call Cameron right now to go bash his face in,” Angela said hype as hell.

“That won’t be necessary soon as he slapped me, Julian came out of nowhere.....he showed Travis his gun and basically told Travis not to mess with me unless he wants problems with him....he came to my rescue.”

“Aww s**t. Zaira done fell in love with a thug huh?,” Angela teased.

“Girl please.....but once he drove me home....he helped me inside to make sure I was ok....I ended up telling him about I was raped and about all of the crap Travis has put me through since we broke up.....and then....he held me....he told me that he was sorry I was raped and he said no woman ever deserves that.....he even said that Travis didn’t deserve me....and then.....we kissed.”

“What?!?! You kissed him?! Ok now give me all of the details please!!”

“Well.....when we pulled out of the embrace we just stared at each other for what seemed like forever....and we moved our faces closer and the next thing I know, his lips are pressed against mine....and then his tongue was in my mouth and like two minutes later....he pulled out of the kiss while sucking on my bottom lip.”

“Oh my gosh.......ahhhhhhh!!,” Angela screamed in excitement. I hit her arm and look at her like she is crazy.

“Girl hush!,” I said.

“I’m sorry girl.....I’m just so happy for you! Now how was that kiss? Was it good?,” Angela asked.

“ was the best kiss I have ever had. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about his lips since.”

“Oh wow....mmm....did he ruin your panties?” I just bulge my eyes at her and she laughs and nods her head.

“He did didn’t he?! I knew it! He got that p***y wet huh?”

“Angela you’re disgusting,” I said while laughing hard.

“I know you can blame Cameron for that. He turns me out almost every night, I can’t help it,” Angela said while shrugging her shoulders. I just laugh and look around a bit, and I see Julian walking with a tray in his hand looking around for a place to sit. Angela turns her head to see who I am looking at and then she looks at me and smiles.

“There goes your boo now,” Angela said.

“Angela stop! He is not my boo!,” I defended.

“Yeah not yet. Not yet Zaira.” When Julian sees me, he locks eyes with me. I smile at him and wave and he smiles a bit and then walks over to my table while staring at me.

“Hi Zaira,” Julian said shyly.

“Hi Julian,” I said shyly as well. Julian then looks at Angela and holds out his right hand to her.

“Hi, I’m Julian,” Julian said politely.

“I’m Angela, it’s nice to meet you,” Angela said while shaking Julian’s hand.

“Nice to meet you too,” Julian said.

“You know what? Julian why don’t you take my seat? I’m going to get another table with Cameron since he is on his way. Zaira, I’ll see you later,” Angela said while standing up and holding her tray.

“Thanks Angela,” Julian said. Angela winks at me then walks away and Julian sits down across from me and looks at me.

“...How are you doing?,” Julian asked shyly.

“I’m good how about you?,” I asked shyly as well.

“I’m good.” I just look at Julian a bit confused. I thought for sure things between us would be awkward after we kissed, but he is being very inviting, which is strange to me.

“....You look confused,” Julian asked.

“Oh...I just thought things would be awkward between us after know,” I said.

“After we kissed?”

“ kept telling to stay away from you remember? Did the kiss change that?”

“Zaira....that kissed changed everything,” Julian said while shaking his head.

“....You make it sound like a bad thing,” I said while looking down.

“It’s not....I meant what I said don’t want someone like me,” Julian said while looking down too. I look up at him and I see him hanging his head in shame. I guess he felt me looking at me because he eventually looks up at me and we lock eyes.

“Julian.....our kiss meant something to me,” I said honestly.

“....It meant something to me too,” Julian confessed.

“......I like you Julian.” He just looks at me in shock and he shakes his head vigorously while looking at me.

“No you don’t,” Julian said.

“Yes I do Julian,” I said.

“.....You don’t understand Zaira.”

“....I think I do.....I don’t care about what you call your job if that is what you are worried about. I don’t judge,” I said boldly. Julian raises both eyebrows at me in shock. He leans forward and looks at me intensely.

“....What?,” Julian whispered in shock.

“....I know what you’re a drug dealer right?,” I whispered back. Julian’s eyes just bulge in shock. He looks around and then looks back at me.

“.....Who told you?,” Julian whispered through clenched teeth.

“No one told me anything, it’s obvious. You carry a gun. You carry a very large amount of money on you. The night I saw you at the bus stop you had on all black, like you wanted to blend in with the dark so you won’t be seen while you are doing your “job.” You’ve been injured by someone other than yourself when you hurt your hand and the cut on your arm. I never see you out at parties or anything at night. That is probably when you work. And....I noticed small empty bags in your car. I am sure that is what you package your product in,” I said. Julian just sighs and sits back in his seat and stares at me.

“ did you know?,” he asked shamefully with his head down.

“All those’s obvious to dad was a drug dealer all my life so I can put two and two together,” I said shamefully as well. Julian’s head shoots up as he looks at me in shock.

“....He was? Did he quit?,” Julian asked.

“....No....he was killed when I was 17,” I said softly.

“Oh Zaira, I’m sorry to hear that.”

“It’s have a future. This doesn’t have to be your life.”

“....I’m in some deep s**t Zaira, I can’t quit now.”

“....How did your brother die Julian? Huh? Was he killed over drugs?” Julian just stares at me and I can see his eyes turn angry.

“I knew it....I knew this s**t was a mistake....I should have stayed away like I told myself to do,” Julian said rudely.

“What’s a mistake Julian?,” I asked.

“Ever meeting you....I don’t know why I thought we could actually be something....well we can’t. It was all a mistake. Friday night especially was a mistake. Taking you home and kissing was all a mistake. I have to go.” I just look at him with pure hurt in my eyes. He can’t really mean what he said.

“....I hit a nerve didn’t I? Your brother was killed over drugs right? Well how can you do the same thing he did huh? What about Alexis? How heartbroken would she be if she lost her uncle too? And what about your mom Julian? She already lost a son do you think she wants to bury another one? She would die of a broken heart Julian if she had to bury you.....just the way my mom did after my dad died,” I said with tears in my eyes at this point. Julian just looks at me and shakes his head. He grabs his tray and stands up and walks away. I just sit there in shock. How can he say meeting me was a mistake? Why would he help me out then if he really didn’t care like he said? I refuse to believe anything Julian just said and I won’t.

It's about time he let that guard down
Run it!!

yaaaaaaaaaaaaaay u got Julian involved and scared travis off
girl we gon b good friends now
and they shared the most passionate and amazing first kiss
loved that add
run itttt

Wow Travis is a d***. Julian should have knocked him out like Cameron did. Finally Julian is opening up and not being so distant.
When they was kissing o_0 lol.

It's so sad how Julian kinda got sucked into the drug game. He never wanted that life. It's tragic that he found his brother dead off of the s*** some other nigga did!!! I hope he gets out one day. I hope he can be free from the threats and the loneliness.

Travis is a f***ing b**** ass nigga. Zaira needs a restraining order on his b**** ass!!! He's hit her numerous times, while putting her down, but claims he wants her back. I'm glad Julian was there to protect her!! He's finally giving into the fact that fate has put them together!! Yay!! *does happy dance* Lol But that KISS...WHOA!!!! They were getting hot and heavy there. They finally kissed. I hope it doesn't make things awkward now. They need each other to get through the tragedies in their lives. To open their hearts again...Run it!!

Also about Julian's brother I feel really bad about that its not fair that he had to get killed that is horrible and for Julian to come and try to save his brother and find him dead because it is too late is the worst then to have his own life threatened even though its not his or his brothers debt at all and I'm glad Alexis wasn't there at the house that night idk what would have happened and Julian earned 4,000 in 8 months please don't let him take that long to earn the res I don't see why he can just borrow the money from somebody and what if zaira is the one to get him out of the drug dealing game maybe pay his debt for him or figure a way for him to get out that would be so great run it

At Julian saved her omg that was so sweet Travis is a b**** ugh he is so mean I'm glad Julian is sweet and understanding he made sure she got in okay aww and I'm glad zaira opened up to him that was so cute when he held her I would have never guessed and they freaking missed OMG yes I'm so proud if them finally yes this is amazing they kissed and then they will soon get together....they have to I wonder is he gonna tell his mom about what happened this is wow I'm so happy run it