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Secluded Heart (Complete)

<a href="">Zaira</a> had everything going for her. She was excelling in her junior year at college at age 21, was involved in multiple extracurricular activities, and was madly in love with her boyfriend, <a href="">Travis</a>. Everything seemed to be perfect, that is, until she met <a href="">him</a> and he turned her world upside down.


Thanks for all the love everyone!! I really appreciate it! Happy New Years :)

Zaira is just too kind.
If someone kept treating me like Julian does to her,
I would have left him alone by now.
But then again julian is just so sexy so maybe not.
Im glad he finally accepted her help.
I wonder whats his deal tho.
Like who was at his place that he couldnt stay there.
I need answers.

Run it


It’s been a month and a couple days since my last encounter with Julian. I have only seen him a few times and if he does see me, he always looks the other way. I have tried to start a conversation but he literally just walks away from me without saying anything. I really don’t like the feeling of being ignored, so I have been trying to keep my distance. I just wish I didn’t think about him so much. I know it’s crazy that I still want to get to know Julian even after the way he has treated me. It’s just something about him that strongly attracts me to him. Maybe it’s his mysterious manners, I’m not sure. I just know that I want to see him again and often. As for Travis, he is still trying to get back with him. He must really think I am stupid. First of all, he is always with Lisa and I am sure they are still f**king so why would I want to get back with him? He has shown Lisa off to the whole campus so now everyone thinks they are together, so what would I look like running back to him? I’m not a fool. Secondly, Julian really has my interest. I want to at least be his friend if nothing else. I feel like I met him for a reason. I have been on this campus for three years and I have never seen him before. I did find out that he is a junior, so he’s my age. Angela always finds out information me, that’s why I love her. Julian is just so intriguing to me and he is so fine! I have never been so into someone that won’t give me the time of day and I hope that doesn’t make me crazy or bite me in the a** later. Anyway, I am not giving up on him that’s all I can say. Well it’s Friday night at around 10 pm and I am on my way home from the mall in my car. I just went to buy a few pairs of jeans. As I am driving on campus, towards my apartments, I notice a man walking stumbling a bit and holding the top part of his right arm in pain. I slowly drive past to see a face and I gasp in shock when I see it’s Julian. I quickly pull over my car to the curb and he stops walking in fear. He must think I am after him or something. I quickly get out of the car and it’s so dark I can barely see him. The next thing I know he pulls out a 9 mm gun from his waist and has it pointed in my face. I just gasp and put my hands up in fear.

“’s me. Zaira,” I said my voice shaking in fear. He moves closer to me and when he makes out my face he sighs and puts his gun back in his pants and looks at me like I am crazy.

“What the f**k are you doing? Why you running up on me like that?,” he said.

“I wasn’t.....I...I just saw you and I saw you holding your arm in pain. I want to help you,” I said.

“Here you go with that helping s**t again, I’m fine alright?”

“No you’re not fine....let me take you to a hospital. Please. I can’t just leave you out here.”

“I’m headed to my apartment I will be fine.”

“Let me drive you.” I walk over to him and I grab his left hand and he quickly snatches it away. I look at my hand and see it filled with Julian’s blood. I inspect him and I see his t-shirt is torn and I see a cut on his upper arm that is bleeding pretty badly.

“Come on Julian....we have to clean this cut up before it gets infected,” I said.

“I’m not going anywhere with you. I can walk I’ll be fine,” he said slightly aggravated.

“Julian stop being foolish. You need help and I am here to help you....I will take you wherever you need to go.” He just looks at me and sighs heavily.

“Come on Julian....I won’t hurt you,” I said softly.

“I just need you to drop me of at my apartment and that’s it. Do you hear me?,” he said harshly.

“Yes I hear you.” I open the passenger door for him and he hesitantly gets in the car and pulls the door closed. I get in on the driver side and close my door. I rummage around my back seat and pull out a t-shirt and hand it to Julian.

“Put it around your arm to stop the bleeding,” I said. He does as I say and I start to drive.

“What’s your address?,” I asked.

“Just drop me off on Evans Street.”

“You live in Garden Hill apartments?” He just nods his head without looking at me.

“I live in the ones four blocks down. The Springfield ones.” He just looks out the window and I sigh.

“Are you ok?,” I asked.

“I’m fine,” he said nonchalantly. I focus on the road and 10 minutes later I turn onto Evans Street. I turn into the apartment complex and I look at Julian. He is ducked down in his seat and is using his hand to cover his face.

“What’s wrong?,” I asked.

“Drive,” he said.

“What?,” I asked in confusion.

“Drive!,” he yelled. I pull out of the complex and drive off and look at him. He keeps looking in the side view mirror and turning his head to look behind us.

“What is going on?,” I asked in fear.

“Nothing,” he said.

“Do you want to go to the hospital?”

“No I can’t do that.”

“I can take you to my apartment. I can clean you up.” He just looks at me and I turn my head to look at him. He looks away and I focus back on the road. Once I get to my apartment, I get out of the car and then I go to Julian’s side. He opens the door and I try to help him out, but he pushes me away. I just shake my head and I walk up to my door unlock it and open it and walk in. Julian hesitantly walks in and looks around a bit. I close and lock the door behind me and I look at Julian. He takes of his t-shirt so he just has on a beater and I can’t help but let my eyes roam up and down his toned, tattooed arms. I look at his right arm and notice the 2-3 inch length cut.

“I have a first aid kit. I will be right back,” I said. I quickly go into my bathroom and take out the first aid kit, washcloth and hydrogen peroxide. I set it on the sink and look in the mirror. I notice that Julian’s blood is on my t-shirt. I take it off, so I just have on my bra and camisole. I grab the first aid kit, washcloth and hydrogen peroxide and walk into the living room and I see Julian sitting on the couch looking in a direction away from me. I walk over to the couch and sit next to him on his right side. I open the hydrogen peroxide and gently pour it on the cut and he flinches in pain. I gently rub the washcloth over the cut and I look at him as he looks away.

“....Is this ok?,” I asked. He looks at me and I watch his eyes travel down my face, neck, chest, torso, and then travel back up to my breasts. They stay there for a quick second and he quickly shakes his head while looking away. I bit my lip a bit and look down a bit embarrassed. I like the way he looks at me and I wouldn’t mind him looking at me whenever he wants to. I clean up his cut really well, and then I put an antiseptic cream on it and then I wrap the cut with a bandage.

“Your cut wasn’t too deep so I don’t think you’ll need stitches,” I said. He nods his head and I clean up the first aid kit and put it back in the bathroom. I walk back out to the living room and look at Julian.

“....Are you hungry? I cooked earlier today I can fix you a plate,” I asked. Julian just looks up at me and he looks me up and down again and then looks forward.

“....Why are you so nice to me huh?,” Julian asked softly. I just shrug my shoulders and he looks up at me.

“I know you have been nothing but rude and cold to me....I just....I just want to help you out. I don’t know why, I just do,” I answered. He studies my face for a second then looks away.

“Do you like fried catfish? That’s what I cooked,” I said. He nods his head and I smile a bit and I walk into the kitchen. I take out all of the food I cooked earlier and I make Julian a nice sized plate. I made fried catfish, collard greens, macaroni and cheese and cornbread. As the plate is heating up in the microwave, I pour a glass of water and get out a bottle of aspirin. Once the plate is heated up, I take it along with his glass of water, fork and bottle of aspirin and I walk into the living room. I set down the glass of water on the table in front of him and I hand him the plate. He takes it and looks up at me.

“Thanks,” he said softly. I just smile because he finally said thank you for a gesture I did.

“You’re welcome Julian....I got you some aspirin in case you are in any pain,” I said. I place the bottle on the table and watch as Julian takes the first few bites off his food.

“....Where are you going to stay tonight?,” I asked while sitting next to Julian.

“......S**t I don’t know.....can’t go back to my place though,” Julian said.

“Why not? Is someone after you?”

“.....Something like that.”

“ can stay here tonight,” I offered. Julian looks at me and scrunches his face up.

“You’re joking right?,” he asked in a bit of shock.

“No I’m serious.....I can sleep on the couch while you sleep in the bed. I can change the sheets for you,” I said.

“What? You would give up your bed and sleep on the couch?”

“Yeah. You’re injured, I can’t have you sleeping all scrunched up on the couch.”

“I’ll pass....I can find somewhere to stay.”

“....Ok....I am going to take a quick shower....I should be out in thirty minutes. Let me know if I need to take you anywhere.” Julian nods his head and I stand up from the couch and go into the bathroom and take a shower. Once I am done in the shower, I wrap a towel around my body and walk into my bedroom. I lotion up quickly and put on underwear, then a gray beater with black sweatpants. I go out to the living room and I don’t see Julian. I go into the kitchen and see him putting his dishes in the sink.

“Hey,” I said softly. He turns to look at me and I look up at him.

“Do you need a ride somewhere?,” I asked.

“....I’m not sure. No one thinks it’s a good idea for me to stay with them,” Julian said while shrugging his shoulders.

“I wouldn’t mind if you stayed.”

“....I don’t know.”

“I get don’t want to stay here with me. I understand when I’m not liked. Just let me know when you need a ride.....I’ll be in my room.” I turn to walk away until I hear Julian speak.

“....It’s not that,” he said softly. I turn back to look at Julian and he just stares at me and I smile at him. He quickly looks down and I move closer to him.

“If you want to stay, you can stay. I’ll leave you be if that’s what you are worried about,” I said. He looks down at me in my eyes and I look into his. I could look into his eyes forever if he let me.

“ you want to take a shower? I have underclothes and clothes if you need them....I bought them for my ex, but I never got the chance to give them to him for our anniversary. They might be a little big on you, but they will work for the night,” I said. Julian nods his head and I smile a bit and ask him to follow me. I show him to the bathroom and show him how to work the shower. I give him a towel, washcloth, boxers and a t-shirt and basketball shorts I bought originally for Travis. I hand everything to him and then he closes the bathroom door. I strip all of the sheets, pillow covers and covers on my bed and put them in the washing machine near the kitchen and start it. I then go back into my bedroom and completely make up the bed. Once I’m done I grab my laptop and phone from my bedroom and leave the bedroom. I set my laptop and phone on the coffee table. I then get spare blankets and pillows from my closet and lie them down on the couch. I sit on the couch and pull my laptop into my lap and catch up on a few television shows. I haven’t heard from Julian since I left him to take a shower, but I am sure he is alright. I don’t want to come off as pushy because that’s not who I really am. I have never been the aggressor when it comes to men and I don’t know why Julian makes me act the way I do. I don’t want to chase him, but I really want to know him better as crazy as that sounds. But with someone like him, I should really just wait to see if he will want to get to know me as well. I don’t want to force anything; I kind of want him to come to me. I want him to show me if he is interested in me. At about 12:30 am, I yawn loudly and shut down my laptop and put it on the table. I look at my phone and see a message from Travis. I quickly erase it then set my phone back on the table. I stand up from the couch and make sure the front door is locked and it is. I then peek inside of my bedroom quietly and I see Julian sleeping peacefully on his back. I can’t help but smile at the sight; he looks so peaceful and calm. His head is turned to the left side and he has his right arm rested across his stomach. I can’t help but admire him. A part of me wants to cuddle with him, but I know better. I quietly close the door and lie down on the couch. I still can’t believe Julian actually accepted my offer to help him. I know he was reluctant at first, but he was injured, so I couldn’t just let him be. I am glad he accepted my offer and I can’t help but fall asleep with a smile on my face.

Julian is such a di*k.
Even is he didnt want help he could have said thank you.


I woke up the next morning a little earlier than usual, around 7:30 am. I kind of had a hard time sleeping last night. It took me a while to stop crying and when I did sleep, it wasn’t very useful. I sit up in the bed and wipe my sore eyes. I just still can’t believe Travis cheated on me. I just want to understand why he did what he did, but I don’t think I ever will. I just loved him so deeply, so this really hurts me. I’m heartbroken actually. But I know I can’t feel sorry for myself either. I just need to move on, no matter how hard that seems right now. I look at my phone and see numerous messages from Travis. I just sigh and look through them and it’s just a bunch of “I’m sorry”, “I miss you”, “I want you back”. I erase all of the messages without even responding and then I set my phone back on the dresser. I lie back down in the bed and turn on the television. I watch a program until 8 and then I start to get ready for breakfast. One of my best friends said she would meet me for breakfast this morning. I get to the dining hall at 9:30 and I find a booth and set my bag down. Then, my friend <a href="">Angela</a> comes walking up to the table.

“Hey beautiful,” Angela said.

“Hi gorgeous,” I responded. I stand up and hug her tight and she kisses my cheek.

“How are you doing girl?”

“Well.....I have to tell you something, but let’s get our breakfast first.”

“Ok girl.” We fix our trays of breakfast and then sit down across from each other at the booth. We each say a quick blessing and then start to eat.

“Girl tell me what’s going on?,” Angela asked.

“Well.....I found out Travis was cheating on me last night and we broke up,” I said.

“What?! Oh hell no that n***a did what?! He cheated on you? With who?,” Angela asked angrily.

“Someone named Lisa....he said he was cheating for about three weeks....I saw a message from her on his phone last night.”

“Oh girl I am so sorry....I knew you had your don’t deserve that at are way too beautiful for that and you deserve the best man walking this earth.”

“Thanks Angela, you’re so sweet,” I said as a few tears ran down her cheeks.

“Oh boo don’t cry...way too pretty to be crying,” Angela said. She walks over to my side of the booth and sits next to me and hugs him tightly. I rest my head on her shoulder and she wipes my tears.

“I know you’re hurting. I know how much you loved him....but if he loved you like he said he did, he would never do this to you.....he would have waited for were raped Zaira and that is one of the worst things a woman could go through and I’m sorry Travis couldn’t understand that....he is the one missing out. You are so beautiful inside and out and one day, you will find someone who appreciates everything about you. I know you will,” Angela said softly.

“....Thank you hurts, but I know I need to move on....he didn’t deserve me and I understand that,” I said softly.

“That’s right boo.” She pulls out of the embrace and looks at me and wipes my tears.

“When I see Travis and that b***h though, I will take care of them, believe that,” Angela said while sitting back on her side of the booth.

“Angela, don’t do anything stupid,” I said.

“Someone needs to knock some sense into both of them....I think they’re coming now!” Angela is looking past me and I see Travis walking into the dining hall, with <a href="">this woman</a> on his arm. I just roll my eyes and look down at my food.

“.....She’s pretty,” I spoke softly.

“She’s alright.....she ain’t nothing compared to you Zaira,” Angela reassured me. Just then Travis walks up to the table and looks at me.

“Zaira, can I please talk to you?,” he asked.

“N***a you have some nerve. Walking in her with another b***h the day after you and Zaira broke up....when I see you and that b***h, you better watch your back,” Angela threatened.

“Angela this isn’t your business,” Travis said calmly.

“It is now Travis,” Angela said.

“Travis what do you want?,” I asked impatiently.

“Why haven’t you returned any of my texts.....I really want us to work things out,” Travis said wearily.

“So that’s why you brought another woman with you? And that’s why she was all on your arm? Is that Lisa? Huh?,” I asked angrily.

“....Yes that’s Lisa,” Travis answered. I just shake my head while looking at him.

“Leave me alone Travis. I don’t want anything to do with you,” I said.

“Baby please,” Travis pleaded.

“I think she said she wants you to leave her alone Travis,” Angela said. Angela holds up a steak knife and Travis just rolls his eyes and walks away.

“That n***a has some nerve huh? Don’t worry boo I am going to take care of him,” Angela said.

“Girl you’re crazy don’t hurt him.....but he is making a fool of me....we just broke up last night and he is already walking with Lisa on his arm like that? That’s embarrassing for me,” I said.

“Don’t be embarrassed....he is the fool for letting you go. You’re not a fool Zaira.”

“I sure feel like one.” Angela smiles a bit and gently rubs my hand and I look at her and smile a bit. We continue eating our food and I notice Julian walking into dining hall. I just stare at him because I just think he is so handsome and sexy. I could watch him for hours and creepy as that sounds. I notice that his left hand is wrapped up in bandages and he has it in a sling.

“Girl who are you staring at?,” Angela said while snapping me out of my daze. She turns her head to look in my direction and she smiles a bit when she sees Julian. She looks at me and smiles and I look down in embarrassment.

“Who is that? Do you know him?,” Angela asked.

“....No just seen him around a few times,” I said while looking up.

“Girl you were practically drooling over him....but he is fine as need to get with that.”

“I don’t think so.....he’s kind of cold....he dropped his id yesterday and I returned it to him and he barely talked to me.”

“ you know his name?”

“It’s Julian.”

“Mmm that’s sexy....maybe he will give you a never know.” I just smile a bit and nod my head as I watch Julian walk towards the food. He looks in my direction, but then looks away quickly. I sigh and continue eating my food. I kind of watch him fix his tray of food and it seems a bit difficult for him since he only has one hand he can use. I kind of feel bad for him and I want to help him, but I am sure he would turn my help down. I watch Julian walk towards his table and a woman stood up from her chair not realizing that Julian was behind her and Julian and stumbled but didn’t fall. He was able to hold his tray, but his drink flew out in front of him. The woman looks at him and says sorry and he sighs and sets down his tray. I look at Angela and he smiles at me.

“Girl I know you want to help him go ahead beautiful,” Angela said while smiling big. I look at her and then I grab some napkins and walk over to where Julian is. He is bent down cleaning up the mess and I kneel down and help him clean as well. He looks up at me and I smile at him.

“Hi Julian,” I said cautiously.

“.....I don’t need your help,” he said while looking down.

“I was just trying to help.”

“Who says I needed your help huh?”

“I’m just trying to be nice....I saw your arm in the sling, so I just figured you could use some hands to help you.”

“I’m fine and I don’t need your about you just leave me alone?” I just look at him and then look down and nod my head.

“Ok....I’ll leave you alone.” I pick up the napkins and walk to the nearest trash can and throw them away. For some reason, I just can’t leave Julian alone and I don’t want to. I notice he had orange juice on his tray and that is what fell on the floor. I get Julian another glass of orange juice with a bit of ice; just how he had it, and yes I noticed that. I take a deep breath and then I walk over to his table and sit across from him and set down the glass and he just looks at me like I am crazy.

“ brought you this orange juice. I noticed you had this before it spilled,” I said nervously. He just narrows his eyes at me and looks me up and down slowly. I get chills every time he looks me up and down and I don’t know why. He grabs the glass and slides it to him and he starts eating. Now I feel really awkward just sitting with someone that doesn’t even want to talk to me.

“....How did you hurt your hand?,” I asked softly. He looks at me and throws down the utensils in his hand, which caused me to jump a little. He narrows his eyes at me and stares at me intensely and I stare back.

“What is your problem? Why are you being nice to me huh?,” he asked evilly.

“Why are you making it sound like a bad thing that I’m nice to you? Maybe.....maybe I’m nice to you because you look like you need someone to be nice to you,” I said shakily.

“I don’t need s**t. Especially not from some b***h.”

“Excuse me? You don’t even know me so you have no right to call me out of my name,” I said boldly. He turns his head to the side a bit and glares at me and I just swallow hard because now he is making me a bit uncomfortable.

“Listen, I have only been nice to you.....would it kill you to be nice back or even say thank you?,” I said.

“I didn’t ask you to do s**t for me. You chose it on your own so why would I say thank you let alone anything to you? Huh?”

“.....Why are you so rude?”

“Ok you’re starting to piss me off.....just leave me alone.”

“What if.....I don’t want to leave you alone?”

“Then I’ll leave you alone....shouldn’t be too hard since I don’t want anything to do with you anyway.” He quickly puts his backpack on his back and takes his tray with his free hand and then leaves the dining hall. I just watch him and sigh heavily. I really don’t think there is anything I can do to get through to Julian so I should just accept it. But something inside of me tells me not to give up.

Why Julian gotta be such a jerk tho? The cute ones always are huh lol. What his story tho. Why's he so mysterious?
Travis you slore, knew you were cheating. Why, would you do that to Zaira. Just cause she wouldnt give you none, you decide to cheat on her, thats plain rude my dude. And you didnt think she'd find out, whats done in the dark always comes to light my dude. Poor Zaira tho. She's completly heartbroken. If Travis was a real man he'd understand where she was coming from about her intimacy issues. he's such a jerk. Poor Zaira. RUN IT!!!

Glad Travis got dumped, with his cheating a** lol
Why is julian so bitter tho?

I'm glad she broke up with his sorry ass!! No one wants to hear all his sorry lies and bulls***. Soo mr mysterious' name is Julius?! I don't like him right now tho. He's so cold and dark. I wonder what his story is. Run it!!

What's up with Julian?
Haha Travis got dumped!
Run it

Travis there isnt much I can say to you.
You had it coming.
You knew the consequences of cheating on her.

Im glad Zaria dumped him.
Most girls would take their men back but not her.
That makes her tough.

Julian is such a d***.
A sexy one but hey still a d*** none the less.
I wonder why tho?
Like why is he so rude?

Run it

Thank you ladies so much for your support so far! I am very excited about this story since I am writing it differently than my other stories. I hope you are all as excited as I am :) Love ya'll <3


I just watched as Travis walked away. I’m just so hurt right now. He is still lying to me and I know it. I know Travis is cheating on me. I see all the signs and I feel it. I may not have proof but I am nowhere near stupid. I know when I am being made a fool of and I actually don’t appreciate Travis doing this to me. He makes it seem like I am always wrong and he always makes me feel bad for not having sex with him. When I was raped.....everything fell apart. I couldn’t eat or sleep for weeks. I went into a deep depression, my grades slipped, and I was put on academic probation. It’s been a little over two years since it happened, and I am really starting to put the pieces back together. My grades have improved dramatically and the academic probation was lifted after a semester of hard work following the rape. I haven’t hardly been depressed and when I found out they caught my rapist my sophomore year and put him in jail for many years to come, I was beyond ecstatic. It made me feel so much better to learn he was no longer walking the streets. Turns out he was a student from another college about twenty minutes away. I did my best to describe him the night it happened, since he looked at me the entire time he was raping me and made me look at him. In a sense it was like he wanted me to know who he was, or he wanted to be caught. Either way I was very happy and things really started to look up from there. When I started dating Travis six months ago, everything really seemed perfect. When we first got together he was the perfect gentleman and so sweet. He always did the sweetest things for me. Candy and flowers for no reason and he took me out quite often and always paid. He still did those things, up until about three weeks ago. He has been so distant since then and I know it’s because he is cheating on me. I don’t know with whom, but I plan to find out. I quickly walk into my building where my class is and walk up the few flights of stairs. As I open the door to the third floor, the man from yesterday comes walking towards me, as if he is going down the stairs. I look at him and he looks back. I don’t why his eyes put me in a trance, but I am lost in his eyes right now.

“Excuse me I have to get to class,” he spoke snapping me out of my daze.

“Oh....uh...I’m sorry,” I said while smiling a bit. He narrows his eyes at me and I move to the side and hold the door open for him and he starts to quickly walk down the stairs. I watch him walk down the stairs, and I notice his id card fly out of his jacket pocket as he rushes down the stairs.

“Wait!,” I yelled. He keeps walking down the stairs. He must not have heard me since he has his headphones on. I walk down the stairs and pick up his id card and look at it. It has the name of our school “Virginia State University” our logo, his non-smiling, serious picture, his student id number, and his name: Julian Matthews. I smile a bit at the fact that I now know his name. I have always liked the name Julian. I grip the card tight in my hand and quickly walk down the stairs and outside. I quickly look around and see him walking. I quickly walk to catch up with him and I lightly tap his shoulder. He quickly turns around and when he sees me he slowly looks me up and down. For some reason I didn’t mind his eyes traveling my body, but I did get this weird sensation in my stomach. He takes off his headphone and looks me in my eyes.

“Can I help you with something?,” he said kind of rudely.

“ dropped,” I am cut off.

“Can you talk?” I just look up at him in a bit of shock. I don’t know why he gets me so tongue tied.

“I’m sorry. You dropped your id card on the stairs and I just wanted to return it to you,” I said. I put my hand out with his card and he looks at my hand and quickly takes the card and shoves it in his pocket. I look up at him and smile. He practically towers over me, since I am only 5’3”. He has to be at least 6 feet tall.

“Uh my name’s Zaira....I see your name’s Julian?,” I said nervously. I put out my hand for him to shake it and he looks at my hand then back up at me.

“I have to get to class,” Julian said. He quickly turns around, puts his headphones back on and walks off. I just watch him walk away. He is so mysterious, but so intriguing at the same time. He comes off so distant though, like he wants nothing to do with anyone in the world. I sigh a bit and turn around and walk back to my class. At least now I can put a name to the face.

Once my classes are over at 3 pm, I grab a quick bite to eat at a campus café and then head to the library to get some work done. At around 6 pm, I head home real quick to get my gym bag. I am a member of the hip hop dance team on campus and we have practice Tuesdays 7-9 pm and Saturdays 12-2 pm. I grab a quick snack then head to the gym. I go into the locker room and change into yoga pants and a beater and tennis shoes. Once I’m ready, I go into our practice room and say hi to everyone that is there. We all sit down and stretch until the instructor enters the room. The two hour practice flew by and it was 9 pm before I knew it. I gather all my things, say bye to everyone and then walk to the bus stop and wait patiently. I pull out my phone and I see a new text message from Travis. I sigh and open the message and it reads: “Hey babe. We need to talk. Can I please come over?” I quickly reply with: “Should be home in thirty minutes” and then I put my phone back in my bag. I look around and I notice Julian come to the bus stop. He is wearing all black and has his black sweatshirt hood pulled over his black cap. He sits down on the same bench as me and pulls out his phone and starts texting. I just watch him silently. He is so handsome to me. Again he must have felt me staring at him because he turns his head and looks me right in my eyes and I look back.

“We just keep running into each other huh?,” I spoke softly trying to start conversation. Julian just looks back at his phone and continues texting without speaking.

“You don’t talk?,” I asked softly. He looks back at me and looks me up and down again and then looks me in my eyes and narrows his eyes at me.

“I don’t know you, why would I talk to you?,” Julian said coldly.

“Because that’s the polite thing to do when you are spoken to,” I said.

“What if I’m not polite?,” Julian responded. I just look at him; his response took me off guard. I just shrug my shoulders and he just looks back at his phone. A few minutes later, another man comes up to Julian wearing a similar outfit. Julian stands up and they dap and then walk off. I just watch him walk away. I wonder what is story is. He is just so cold and distant and I just want to know why. Maybe one day I will find out. My bus comes at 9:10 and I get to my apartment at 9:30 and I see Travis waiting for me at my door. He smiles a bit and I just walk past him and open my door and we both walk inside. I close and lock the door behind us, set down my bag and look at him.

“Baby we need to talk...I don’t like how things are between us right now,” Travis said.

“I don’t either Travis.....but you can’t be honest with me,” I said.

“Honest about what?”

“You know I am going to give you one chance to be honest and come clean....Travis...are you cheating on me?,” I said boldly.

“No Zaira I’m not!,” Travis yelled.

“Stop....just stop! Stop lying to me! If you love me like you say you do, the least you can do is tell me the truth. Now, are you cheating on me?”

“No I’m not! I’m not cheating and I never have!” I just look at him as I shake my head as tears fill my eyes. This sorry excuse for a man is cheating on me and he doesn’t even have the balls to tell me.

“....You son of a b***h. You don’t have the balls to tell me you’re cheating but I am sure you had no problem getting your balls sucked by some ho!,” I yelled in frustration. Travis just looks at me in shock. He knows I am not the type that gets angry about anything, so he knows I must be mad now, which I am. Just then, his phone starts ringing. I just stare at him angrily as he pulls out his phone. The next thing I know, we are on the floor wrestling for his phone. It fell to the floor after I slapped it out of his hand. He tries hard, but I grab it before he has a chance. I am on the floor on my stomach and he is on the floor with his arms wrapped around my legs. I quickly look at the phone and see a text message from someone named Lisa. The text reads: “Hey baby can you get away tonight? I would love to get some of that good d**k ;)” I just read the text message over and over. It confirms all of my suspicions. I just sigh as tears weigh my eyelids down and fall down my cheeks. I turn on my back and look down at Travis at my legs and he just looks at me with a hurt of look across his face. I pull my legs away from him and slide his phone to him. He sits up and I do the same.

“.....How long?,” I whispered.

“Baby I’m so sorry....I am sorry. I never meant to hurt you,” Travis pleaded.

“How long Travis?,” I yelled.

“....About three weeks now,” he said shamefully.

“...Why? Just because I wouldn’t have sex with you huh? Is this all really about sex?”

“I’m sorry Zaira...I just....I have needs....but she doesn’t mean anything to me I swear....I love you.”

“You love me? You love me?! How can you love someone and hurt them on purpose? Huh? Explain that to me Travis!”

“I....well I can’t....but I’m sorry....I don’t want to lose you Zaira...I love you too much.”

“Oh stop! Just stop with the lies! What do you think I am a fool? I am far from that Travis....I can’t believe this. You cheat on me all because I won’t give you any p***y? Really? Is that all a relationship is worth to you? Huh? don’t love me Travis....and you probably never did.”

“That’s not true Zaira! I love you with all of my heart! When I see my future I see you! I see us! Together!” I just shake my head vigorously while I stand up and wipe my face of its’ numerous tears. Travis stands up and reaches out to me and I just put my hands up and back away. Travis tries to wrap his arms around my waist, but I slap his hands away.

“Don’t touch me! Don’t you ever touch me again Travis!,” I yelled.

“Baby I’m sorry....please don’t leave me over this. We can work it. I promise I won’t cheat on you ever again I mean it,” Travis said. Travis moves closer to me and he rests his head on my right shoulder and cries. I just roll my eyes as numerous tears cloud my vision.

“Baby please...I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I love you so much. I will do better I promise,” Travis said softly. I just shake my head and look up towards the ceiling. I take a deep breath and then push him away from me. He looks at me hurt and I just look back at him.

“I can’t let you continue to hurt me....I will not be made a’s over Travis. That’s it....I don’t want anything to do with you,” I said while staring Travis in his eyes.

“You don’t mean that baby.”

“I meant every word I just said....we are through get out.”

“What can I do to make this up to you? I will ¬do anything Zaira.”

“You can’t do get out. Please don’t make me tell you again.” He looks at me with hurt in his eyes and I look back at him the exact same way. He sighs and he puts his phone in his pocket then looks at me.

“....I’m sorry I hurt you was never my intention...I was only being selfish and that has cost me one of the most important things in my life....which is you...but I’m not giving up on you or us....I told you when I see my future I see you baby. I see you as my wife and the mother of my children. I wa-,” Travis is cut off.

“Save it Travis. Just save it. I don’t care what you have to knew exactly what you were doing when you were doing it and you knew the consequences but you just didn’t especially didn’t care about get out,” I said boldly. He looks at me one last time and then wipes his face and opens the door and walks out. I slam and lock the door behind him. I heavily sigh and try to hold back my tears, but they just keep flowing. I walk to my bathroom and turn on the shower to a very warm temperature. I strip down and get in the shower and let the water run down my body. I close my eyes to stop the tears from falling, but there is no use since they continuously fall anyway. I completely break down. How could he do this to me? He always claimed he was happy with me and he said he could wait, but I guess that was all a lie. I loved him so much. I was so good to him. I always did my best to make sure he was happy and comfortable when he was with me, but he cheats on me just because I wasn’t ready to give him sex? I just don’t understand. Of course I understand him wanting to make love to me because I wanted to make love to him. I loved him so much. It’s just every time he touched me, my mind always went to the night I was raped. I don’t know why, but it did. Even though it’s been a little over two years, I can never get that night completely out of my head, no matter how hard I try. We tried so many times and whenever we got close, it’s like Travis’ face turned into the rapist’s face and Travis’ touch felt like the rapist’s touch. I hate that someone I don’t even know could have such an awful effect on my life and relationships. I hate him for that. I have tried to move on from it, but it takes time. I don’t know how long it will take, but I can only take it one day at a time. As for Travis, I can only move on from him one day at a time as well.

TRAVIS needs to f***ing die!!!! He's getting on my nerves with his bulls***. He wanna f*** around and then make her feel bad about it. f*** him. I hope she dumps his lying, cheating, jerk ass!!!

Travis is an ass and he just got me pissed
I really want to hurt him
He is such an idiot for that
As much as I don't want Zaira hurt
I would love for Lisa to show her the truth
Though I would want Lisa to get punched in the process as well
Travis need to get drop kicked!

If Travis loved Zaria he wouldn't be cheating on her and he would wait for her.


I woke up Tuesday morning to soft kisses being planted across my chest. I groaned lowly as I slowly opened my eyes to <a href="">her</a> kissing and licking my chest.

“Girl what you doin’?,” I asked tiredly.

“What does it look like?,” she responded sexily. I watched as her naked body straddled me, causing her to sit right on my d**k. She leaned down and started to suck on my neck, causing me to let out a few small moans.

“Lisa, come on now you know I have to meet Zaira for breakfast. I already skipped out on her yesterday and I can’t do that to her today,” I said while sitting up.

“The only reason you skipped out is because you were getting some good p***y from me isn’t that right?,” Lisa said while slightly grinding her hips on me causing me to become hard.

“Aww s**t, don’t do that Lisa....please try and know what the deal is.” Lisa sucks her teeth and gets off of my lap and looks at me as I look at her.

“Why don’t you just leave her? Huh?,” Lisa asked rudely.

“Why would I do that? I love her. I love her so much.....she is going to be my wife one day,” I said.

“Oh you love her? But that’s why you f**k me right?”

“You should know that’s all we do Lisa....we f**k and that’s it....look I have to head back to my apartment to get ready alright?”

“What if she finds out about us huh? What makes you think she will stay with you?”

“She isn’t going to find out. I’m not going to tell her and you aren’t either right?” She looks at me for a second and then her lips curl into a smile and she nods her head.

“That’s what I thought......I’ll text you later alright? I might stop by tonight,” I said while standing up and sliding on my boxers and pants.

“Ok baby,” Lisa said sweetly. I threw on my beater and shirt and leaned down to Lisa and pecked her lips a few times. I slipped on my shoes and jacket and then headed back to my apartment. As soon as I got there, I quickly did my hygiene routine and got dressed. I texted Zaira to let her know I would meet her for breakfast at 10 since our classes started at 11. She replied back quickly with “Ok baby see you soon :*” I love this woman so much. I know I’m cheating on her, but that’s because I have needs. I’m a 21 year old man and I need sex. It’s been six months since I have been with Zaira and I love her with all of my heart, but she just won’t give me any of her love. She claims it’s because she was raped freshman year when she was 19 at an off campus party. I understand that must have hurt her, I really do, but that’s the past and that’s where she is living. I would never hurt her the way that man did but she won’t even give me the chance to prove that. She barely lets me touch her because she is that scared. All we have done is made out intensely and nothing else. I have barely seen her naked, she hides her body from me every chance she gets. I just don’t understand. It’s not like she was a virgin before the rape anyway, so I don’t see the problem. I have been a great boyfriend to her, besides the cheating, so I deserve a chance at least. So since she wouldn’t give me any sex, I found someone very willing to do so in Lisa. We have been f**king on the low for about three weeks now. Everything about Lisa’s sex game is on point, that’s what keeps me coming back. She knows exactly what I like and she goes out of her way to make sure I am satisfied. I like that. Lisa is a cute girl, but honestly she ain’t s**t compared to Zaira. Zaira has a lot more thickness just where I like it; hips, a** and breasts. Zaira’s body just won’t quit, but she hides it from me. Zaira has everything I could ever want in a girlfriend and a wife, but this one aspect she just won’t give in. I just keep telling myself that eventually she will let her guard down, and when that happens, I’ll rid my hands of Lisa. She knows all I want from her is sex anyway. I just hope that Zaira isn’t suspecting anything. She has never mentioned it, but I know eventually all these lies I have been coming up with are going to bite me in the a**. I don’t like lying to Zaira either; that’s my baby. I just need to figure some things out. No one and I mean no one knows I am cheating except me and Lisa and I would like to keep it that way. I know Zaira would leave me the second she found out I was cheating and I can’t have that. I love her too much for her to leave me. As soon as I was dressed and ready for the day, I grabbed all of my things and headed to meet Zaira for breakfast. I get there right at 10 and as I look around, I see Zaira setting her bag down at a booth. I smile to myself and walk over to her and set my bag down. I grab her waist and pull her towards me and lean down and peck her lips multiple times.

“Hi look great today,” I said. My eyes traveled from Zaira’s shoulder length of natural hair that she chose to wear out today, her fitted sweater, skinny jeans, and knee high boots. It doesn’t help that my woman has a body that kills. She wears a size D bra, has the smallest, fittest waist, but thick hips. Every time I see her, I just want to put my hands all over her. She has this amazing, perfect coke bottle shape, which I love to feel on, but would love so much more to be inside of.

“Thank you baby you look handsome as always,” Zaira complimented.

“Thank you,” I said while smiling. I lean down and peck her lips a few more times and then I grab her hand and we fix our trays of breakfast and then sit down across from each other at the booth and we talk as we eat. Zaira is staring at me, indicating something is on her mind, but I’m not sure what.

“Something on your mind babe?,” I asked.

“Well.....yeah there I feel like we are becoming distant and I don’t like it,” she answered wearily.

“Babe what do you mean?”

“Travis....these past three weeks or so you just seem...distant. Like you don’t want to spend time with me use to spend the night at least a few times a week, now something always comes up...we use to go out a lot, but now we hardly do....just tell me it something about me? Is it something I’m not doing right? Because I love you and I want us to work...I want us to work so bad.”

“Oh baby I’m sorry.” I put my left hand up on the table and open it and she smiles a bit and places her right hand in mine. I picked our hands up and placed them to my lips and kissed hers repeatedly.

“I’m sorry for making you feel like that....I know I haven’t been around as often as I use to, but it has nothing to do with you I promise,” I said assuredly.

“....Are you sure? Are you sure the whole sex thing has nothing to do with this?,” she questioned.

“Zaira, as badly as I want to make love to you because I love you, that’s not why....I told you yesterday I can wait for you and I mean that.”

“Travis I really love you and when I am ready, we can take that step ok? I’m just not ready yet ok?”

“Ok baby I understand. And I love you too.” She looks at me with those beautiful brown eyes of hers and smiles and I smile back.

“Do you want to spend the night tonight? We could order in and watch movies if you want,” Zaira asked sweetly.

“I would love to do that baby. I promise, no interruptions this time,” I said while smiling big. She smiles back at me and I kiss her hand. Once we finished our breakfast, we gathered our things and walked to class, hand in hand. Once we got to her building, we stop walking and she turns to look at me. I wrap my arms around her waist and she wraps her arms around my neck. I lean down and passionately kiss her lips. I slide my tongue inside of her mouth and when she moaned in my mouth, I felt chills run through my entire body and my d**k instantly got hard. I better stop because it’s not like Zaira is going to do anything about my hard d**k. I grab her arms and pull her away from me and she looks at me confused.

“What’s the matter?,” she asked with concern.

“Zaira just me kissing you gets my d**k hard and we both know you aren’t going to do anything about it, so I had to stop you,” I said. She just looks at me and I can tell my statement hurt her and I just sigh.

“...You don’t have to make me feel bad about it Travis,” she said softly.

“I’m sorry but it’s true. You don’t even let me touch you Zaira....and these sexy outfits you wear all the time don’t help,” I said slightly aggravated. She looks down and inspects her outfit and then looks back up at me.

“I thought you liked the way I dressed....I want to look good for you Travis,” she said. I look her in her eyes and I can see her eyes tearing up. D**n she is so sensitive about this topic.

“Why are you crying huh?,” I asked.

“.....This isn’t like you Travis....what is really going on? Are you not happy with me? Because I cannot take you making me feel bad about the way I feel. I can’t and I won’t,” she said boldly.

“It’s not that....but you aren’t even trying won’t even give me a chance to prove I am nothing like the man that raped you...and if you aren’t going to try....why should I?,” I said hurtfully. She just looks at me with so much hurt in her eyes and tears flow down her cheeks.

“Wh...what are you saying to me?,” she said shakily.

“Man I don’t even know.....I’ll text you later,” I said through sighs.

“.....You think I’m stupid Travis? Huh?” I just look at her with my face scrunched up; what is she talking about?

“What? What are you talking about?,” I questioned.

“We never use to fight like this.....all the leaving me and making me feel bad for not having sex with all makes I am going to ask you this and you better be honest with me....are you cheating on me Travis?,” she asked angrily. It feels like the wind has just been knocked out of me; she caught me. I don’t even know what to say. I look down and then look back at her with the most evil look on my face. I can tell she is scared because she gasped as she looked at me in fear.

“How dare you. How dare you Zaira....I can’t believe you can ask me a question like that. I have never cheated on you and I can’t believe you can ask me such a thing,” I said while shaking my head. She just looks at me and she looks down and more tears roll down her cheeks. I just roll my eyes and sigh.

“You are way too sensitive Zaira.....I will see you later,” I said while sighing heavily. I just turn away from her without saying anything else and walk off to my class. I can’t believe she knows. I guess it was obvious in a sense, but she has never caught me with Lisa or in the act, so she doesn’t have real proof, but she still knows anyway. I just walk to my class and go on about my day; I’m not about to let this s**t ruin my day.

I know i'm going to like this. travis is def cheating. You can tell right off the bat. Poor Zaira, sucks that she was raped. I wonder who did it? Mystery guy is kind of...odd. He seems off a bit and he acts strange whenever he see's her. Maybe he was the one that raped her? Unless she saw the rapists face, then nevermind. But i dont know, i'll have to read to find out.

Run it

Aww you got another one on your hands!!! I like Zaria. Its so sad about what happened to her. I can't imagine going through that terrible experience. Travis is a f***ing trip!! He think all that sweet talking after he disrespects her is just gonna make everything all right. I don't like the way he leaves either. I think he is cheating, since he's not getting sex from Zaria. But this mysterious stranger is very handsome. I wonder what his deal is. run it!!!

Got another one on your hands I see, Nicole. I like this damn so Zaira was raped? I wonder by who? Travis is full of sh*t, yeah he's cheating all these excuse he's coming up with to Zaira, Fyne as hell or not, he's dead wrong for cheating just cause Zaira aint ready to give him the panties yet. Hmm this mystery guys is hot and he's got Zaira thinking bout him to, Hope she runs(literally)into him again. RUN IT.

@naw21 I've been so busy moving getting ready for nursing school that I'm now finally able to get back into your stories. Yayyyyyy

Your stories are the best.
Trey is definitely cheating.

@logankai25 girl I miss you so much!!!!!! Thanks for the comment :)

Run lt Nicole

I woke up to the buzzing of my alarm clock at 8 am. I slowly turned on my side to face the nightstand and quickly shut off the alarm. I sat up in the bed and stretched, then took a look at my iPhone. I pick it up and become a bit disappointed when I don’t see the usual “good morning beautiful” text from my boyfriend of six months, Travis. I sighed and went to the bathroom to get myself together. Once showered, and dressed, I did my hair and quickly put on a bit of makeup. It’s 9:30 Monday morning, and it was my routine to go meet Travis for breakfast before class at 10:35. I packed my books in my shoulder bag, put on my shoes and jacket and left my one bedroom apartment. I took the bus to the main part of campus and walked my way to the Smith Hall for breakfast. I looked around for Travis, but since I didn’t see him, I just got my breakfast and sat down at a four person table. I said my blessing then started to eat. I kept looking at my phone to see if Travis texted me to say he was late, but he never did and he never showed up. Once done with breakfast, I gathered my things and left and walked towards my class. As I was walking, I felt arms wrap around my waist from behind. I quickly turned around and Travis stood in front of me smiling big.

“Hey beautiful,” Travis said.

“Hey baby....I missed you at breakfast,” I said while wrapping my arms around his waist.

“Sorry about that babe, I overslept so I just decided to meet you at class, but I saw you walking and I wasn’t just going to let you walk by.” Travis leans down and pecks my lips then gently rubs my bottom lip with his thumb while looking in my eyes.

“Are you coming with me to the library tonight? I plan to go at 6,” I said as we started to walk towards my class hand in hand.

“Naw babe I’m sorry I have a study group tonight at that time and I have class all day....I can meet you at your place tonight at around 9 though....maybe you can put on something sexy for me,” Travis said while looking at me seductively.

“Travis....not this again,” I said while sighing.

“Yes this again.....look Zaira you know I love you and I just don’t understand why that’s not enough.”

“How can you say that? I know you love me and I love you too Travis....but this has nothing to do with love and you know it.”

“I just don’t understand....we don’t even try....and besides that s**t happened your freshman year and we are juniors now when are you going to be over it? Huh?” I just looked at Travis with hurt in my eyes and he just looks down and sighs heavily.

“Travis...I don’t know how you can say that to me......I was raped and I am still trying to get over it ok? I thought you understood that, you always said you did,” I said.

“Yeah well maybe I don’t.....look I’ll text you later alright?,” Travis said. He kisses my cheek then walks off in another direction as I watch him walk off in shock. He always gives me a kiss on the lips whenever he sees me and he usually can’t keep his lips off of mine. He has been so distant lately and I think I am starting to understand why. I just hope he really loves me the way I love him and hope and pray he won’t do anything to jeopardize our relationship. I sigh heavily as I walk to my class with my head down. As I am walking, I bump into someone, causing notebooks to fly everywhere. I just gasp in shock and quickly kneel down to gather the few notebooks and papers that fell to the ground.

“I’m so sorry. I wasn’t watching where I was going at all,” I rambled. Just then I feel a hand rest on top of mine and I look up and see <a href="">this man</a> looking at me intensely. I don’t know what it is, but his eyes....they are just mesmerizing. He takes his notebook and papers out of my hands and stands up and then I stand up as well.

“I’m sorry. I was not paying attention at all,” I said while laughing nervously.

“It’s no problem,” the man said nonchalantly. He looks me up and down quickly before walking away. I turn around to watch him walk away. I don’t know what it was about him, but he just had a strange effect on me and I’m not sure why. I just shrug the feeling off and quickly walk to class before I’m late.

Once classes were over, I ate dinner with a few of my friends and then I head to the library alone. It’s kind of packed, so I roam a few floors in order to find a table. As I am walking the third floor, I notice the man from earlier, sitting at a table alone. He has his headphones on and he is lightly bobbing his head while writing down notes. For some reason a smile formed across my face as I watch him. I guess he felt me watching him because he looked up at me right in my eyes. I smiled at him and he looked down quickly and continued his work. I would ask him if I could share the table with him, but seeing how he reacted to a smile, I think I will pass. I look down and continue walking and find an empty table a few tables down. I take out my laptop, books and notebooks and get to work. I looked at my phone periodically hoping to hear from Travis, but I never did. I really have to talk to Travis because as of the last few weeks, he makes me feel less and less important and it’s starting to hurt.

At around 9 pm, I head home from the library. Once I walk up to my apartment door, I see Travis standing there with pink carnations in his hands; my favorite. I smile a little bit and walk towards him and he grabs my waist and leans down and kisses my passionately. After we kiss, he looks me in my eyes and gently rubs my waist with his free hand.

“I brought these for you say I’m sorry for how acted earlier. I was wrong....I don’t want to pressure you into anything you’re not ready for.....I love you and I can wait for you. I know you will be worth it,” Travis said. He hands me the flowers and I smile and gently peck his lips.

“Thank you baby I really appreciate this....thank you for understanding. I love you,” I said.

“I love you too baby,” Travis said.

“You want to come in for a bit?”

“Yeah I’ll stay for a bit babe.” I nod my head as I smile and I unlock my door and Travis follows me into my apartment. I close and lock the door and we both take off our jackets and shoes. Travis follows me into the kitchen and I place the flowers in a vase of water and smell them and smile.

“You want some dessert babe? I have some strawberry cheesecake that I made yesterday,” I said while opening the fridge.

“I would love that babe thanks,” Travis said. I take out the dessert, put two slices on two plates and then walk into the bedroom with Travis behind me. We both sit on the bed next to each other and I turn on the television and we enjoy our dessert together. Once we are done eating, we set our plates on the nightstand and I scoot close to Travis and he wraps his arms around me and kisses my forehead. We talk for a little but until around 10:30 pm, which is when I feel Travis’ phone vibrate in his pocket. I pull back from him and he pulls out his phone, reads a text message then looks at me and sighs.

“....You have to go?,” I said while sighing as well.

“Yeah baby I am so roommate Jamal lost his keys I have to let him in,” Travis said.

“Oh ok.....well thanks for the flowers baby and thanks for spending time with me. I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Of course baby. I love you.”

“I love you too.” Travis kisses my lips a few times before getting up from my bed. I walk him to the door and watch him as he puts on his shoes and jacket. He hugs me tightly and kisses my lips one last time before leaving. I close and lock the door behind me and sigh as I rest my back against the door. He really must think I’m stupid. These past three weeks whenever we spend time together, something or better yet someone always takes his attention away from me. I have seen all the signs, but I just can’t accept Travis cheating on me. I really hope he hasn’t because that would hurt me so deeply. He is only my second boyfriend and I am really in love with him. I want us to work. I quickly wipe the few tears that rolled down my cheeks and walk back to my bedroom. I change into a beater and basketball shorts and lie down in my bed and get comfortable under the covers. For some reason the man I bumped into this morning popped into my head and a smile forms across my face. He was very handsome. His dyed blonde hair, his nose ring, and the freckles he had placed over his cheeks especially stand out to me. Also I noticed his arms were full of very unique tattoos. He was tall and built, not too skinny and not too big. For some reason, I would like to see him again and I’m not sure why. I wonder what his name is?