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Dusk Before Dawn.

I sat quietly in the living room, on the floor, listening to the walls sway in our strangled apartment complex. I looked at the clock near the couch. Almost four. I should finish dinner. I stood up, and headed toward the kitchen, catching a glimpse of myself in the reflection of a photograph hanging on the wall. I stopped and stared for a moment, putting my finger to my lip. My eyes swelled, but I made the tears retreat back to their hiding places. There was no room for them here. I went into the kitchen and discovered another leak beneath the sink. I scurried to find another empty pot to catch the water. I’d tell him. But I couldn’t. He’d blame it on me. I closed the cabinet and went into the refrigerator, retrieving the steaks I’d let marinate throughout the day, while I cleaned the apartment ruthlessly. Not a speck on the carpet. I moved quickly, placing the steaks in to broil and heating up the mashed potatoes. I went to the table and put our plates down. I shined the forks and knives with my t-shirt and placed them parallel to the plates. I looked at the clock. 4:24. My heartbeat quickened. I took another look at the living room before I scurried down the hall to the bedroom to make sure that everything was in its place.

I went back into the living room, just as I heard the door click and saw the knob turn. He entered the house and his eyes fell upon mine. My breath scurried away and I smiled a little, hoping he was in a good mood. He shut the door behind him, ignoring me, and began to take off his shoes. I should say something. Ask him how his day is. Do it!

“H-how was your day, babe?” I asked.

“Dinner ready?” He responded, loosening his tie.

“The steaks are in the oven right now. Mashed potatoes and broccoli is done.” I said quickly.

He stared at me for a moment before he walked past me. I exhaled and stood there, before I felt a blow to my lower back. I fell to my knees – asking God, “Why?” the entire way down.


Well first off, I'm extremely sad for Joy. She always gets the short end of the stick.

I liked her and Tru. They were perfect for each other...

Geesh I missed a lot

awwwww i feel so bad for joy...i just want her to be happy

run it!!!!

Why am I crying? I have been reading quietly but this is killing me like I feel Joy's pain so deep. Poor Joy Man smh ... Her and Tru were perfect for each other.

I need to get myself together. Can't wait for more!!
Run It

You are breaking my heart girl!! Like why does Joy have to go through all this crap?! She doesn't deserve it at all. Her and Tru were PERFECT together, now he doesn't remember her and he is starting a relationship with Chanel?! Like no, not cool at all. Ugh too in my feelings right now. RUN IT!!!

run it

I can't take this!!!! My heart is literally breaking right now!! Why?? Why did he have to forget her, forget himself?? This is so sad!!! Just when she was making progress with someone, its just snatched away from her. Until she was left with a shell of Tru. I understand him reverting back to the life he had before, because its all he knows. But maybe he'll see that the same reasons he left those things behind will resurface.

I really hope for the best with Joy and Tru. I know this has to hurt Joy to lose him like that.

I think Tru remembers everything! I think he is playing cause she is scared or some s***...and whyyyyyyyy did Roland pop up in my mind!?! Oh mercy heart literally aches. I'm so hurt for her man...

Add soon!

Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww, RUN IT!

Damn smh


Run please!

<strong>1 Month Later</strong>

I finished my exam and stood up to leave the classroom. I walked slowly the down the hall, lagging like I did everyday. I didn’t have Tru’s apartment to rush to after class. Home wasn’t satisfying. I walked out onto the oval and sat down with a sandwich I’d brought from home. I brought my knees to my chest and watched people walk through, on their way to class. I felt a hand on my shoulder, so I turned and followed the hand, which I recognized immediately. Tru stood there, smiling.

“Hi Joy,” He said softly.

“Hi,” I said, smiling faintly and looking down at my sandwich.

Tru walked around and sat down next to me on the bench. I focused on the sandwich and not his familiar cologne. He studied me as I ate.

“Found something of yours,” He said, a piece of paper in his hand.

I looked at him then and then down at the paper. He handed it to me and I ran my fingers across it.

“You read it?” I asked, my eyes diverted down.

“Yeah I did,” He said. “…I’m sorry to add to that story.” He said softly.

I stopped the tears from forming – a skill I’d picked up these last few weeks. I looked at him with cold eyes.

“Don’t apologize. It was destined, right?” I said.

Tru studied my eyes, “Everything okay?” He asked.

“No.” I responded, sighing. “But I’ll get through it. Always do.”

Tru wanted to help – take me away from this, but he was not sure how he could. He still didn’t remember the two of us. Chanel left the library and walked toward Tru when she spotted him. I noticed Chanel, and then I looked over at him to find his eyes waiting on mine.

“…Second time around, huh?” I asked him.

“We’re just seeing where it goes.” He whispered.

“Right,” I said, nodding. “Lucky girl.”

I stood up and put my bag on my shoulder. Tru stood up too.

“I was hoping to run into you for a few reasons,” He said.

I stopped and looked at him with annoyance sewed into my lips, “Mmhm.” I said.

“Why that face?” He asked.

“What face?” I asked him, more annoyed now.

“That one that you’re making right now…your annoyed face. Why are you annoyed? Is it because I’m talking to you, or because of Chanel?” He asked.

My annoyed face. How did he know it? I decided not to dwell on that and shrugged.

“A bit of both.” I responded.

“Well listen…I miss you being at the house, reminding me of things. We should get coffee soon and catch up. Meet each other where we’re at, you know?” He said.

Chanel approached and smiled a little at me. I looked at Tru and shook my head, “I’d rather not.” I said. “You guys have fun.”

I turned and walked away. Tru stood there watching me leave and he felt something in the pit of his stomach – like he’d swallowed a hundred tiny nails.

He stood amongst friends with a beer in his hand, as he posed for a picture with his bruhs. I walked in wearing some dark jeans, a v-neck and some brown sandals. I shuffled between people in the living room and headed toward the kitchen where he was. He looked up and smiled when he saw me.

“Joy! What’s up homie?” He asked, hugging me with one arm and pointing at me. “Chanel this is Joy! Joy this is Chanel.”

I looked at Chanel and forced a smile. He’d mentioned her before. He’d taken her to homecoming. They’d also had a brief relationship. She smiled a little.

“He told me about all that you’ve done for him…you’re really sweet for helping him get back to his life.” She said.

“It’s nothing.” I said, nodding and smiling up at him.

Tru smiled and rubbed my arm before he let go of me and took the empty beer bottle out of Chanel’s hand. He handed her another and smirked.

“Tru I’ve got to drive home,” She said.

“Who said that? You can crash here.” He said, finishing his bottle.

I studied the two of them and stepped back a little. Chanel sighed and smiled, taking off the cap of the beer. I grabbed one of the bottles of Vodka from the counter and walked down the hall to Tru’s room. I walked inside and shut the door behind me, before I took off the top and put the bottle to my lips. I took a swig, and was met immediately with tear-filled eyes. The tears fell one after the other as I sunk deeper into an alcohol-induced sadness. I hadn’t noticed how fast time was passing. I looked up when I heard the door opening and saw Chanel with Tru standing there, hand-in-hand. I looked at the two of them and Tru looked at me, his mouth falling a little. I stood up and wiped my cheeks, holding the bottle by the neck.

“I left some things in the top drawer of that dresser,” I said, before I brushed past the two of them toward the door.

Tru followed me out and grabbed my arm as I entered the hall.

“Joy I’m sorry,” He said.

I looked at him and shrugged, “Why are you apologizing? It’s not like you know how much we meant to each other…I opened up my world to you and I felt safe here. I…thought I was done with all of this hurt.” I said, crying then. “But this isn’t your fault. It’s mine. I’m supposed to be alone. I should just be alone,”

Tru grabbed my hands, “If I loved you then…you gave me something that I needed and I’m sure we had great moments. The fact that you’re here still lets me know that you aren’t supposed to be alone, Joy.”

“Yeah well…the one I want doesn’t know me. I’m already alone. I won’t be back, Trupayne.” I said, swallowing.

I kissed his lips softly and turned to leave, the bottle still in my hand.

I came to Tru’s house with groceries, and when I opened the door, I found Carter and a few of the guys on the couch, playing video games. Tru sat with a Twizzler in his mouth, and a grin on his face. I shut the door.

“Hey,” I said softly.

Carter looked up from his controller, “Yo! Joy what’s good?” He said.

Tru looked over at me and smiled, “Hey,” He said, sitting down his controller and standing up. He walked toward me and took the groceries from me.

“I was going to do this tomorrow. Thank you though.” He said, smiling and carrying the bags to the kitchen.

I stood near the counter and watched as he put things away rhythmically. He remembered where to put the spices, and how he arranged his juices and milk on the bottom shelf. I wished he were that familiar with me.

“Remember anything new today?” I asked.

“Nah. Yesterday was senior homecoming.” He said, sighing and looking over at me. “I’m sorry. I know you’re waiting on me.”

I shook my head, “No…I’ve kind of gotten used to the new you.” I said, smiling reassuringly.

Inside I was breaking, but I didn’t want him to know. Didn’t want him to feel guilty.

“I see you brought the guys over.” I said.

He nodded, “Yeah yeah. Miss them, you know? Weird that I dropped my letters. I just don’t believe that. We’re going to have a little set over here tonight. You should come. Bring some friends.”

Tru would know that I have no friends. This stand-in had the slightest clue. But I wanted any chance to be next to him…in the hopes that he would remember us, so I plastered on a smile.

“I’ll be there.” I said.

He smiled at me and took a bite out of an apple.

“I graduated?” He asked, pointing at his degree on the wall.

I nodded, walking toward him and putting my hands in my jeans.

“Yeah, you did.” I said softly.

He came home today and I volunteered to come and help him get reacquainted. He still hadn’t asked who I was, but he seemed interested in getting to know me. It was painful, being on this side of Tru…knowing that he’d unlearned all that we shared these past few months. I was trying to hold it all together.

“You thirsty?” He asked, walking into the kitchen, and finding an empty fridge. “Right. I probably should go grocery shopping. Wait, do I work?”

He came into the living room frantically and I smiled, “Yeah you’re an engineer.” I said, going into his room and grabbing his work badge.

“Whoa.” He said, smiling. “I’ve got to tell the bruhs. Did they come see me in the hospital?” He asked, going to the couch and grabbing his phone.

“You dropped your letters a few weeks before graduation,” I said softly.

He stopped in the middle of dialing a number and looked up at me. “…I did?” He asked softly. “Why…why did I do that?”

“Didn’t feel like you fit in with them.” I said.

“I told you?” <a href=>He</a> asked.

I nodded, “Yeah…we were really close.”

“…Like best friends, or?” He asked, searching my face.

I could see his chest rising and falling faster. He swallowed hard, his eyes glued to me.

“…Girlfriend,” I said. “We just kind of established that.” I said softly.

“Girlfriend.” He stated, his eyebrows raised. “Oh…I didn’t…didn’t know I had a girlfriend.” He said, hopping up now. “Is there a reason you haven’t said anything?” He asked, looking at me now.

I opened my mouth to speak but he interjected. “That explains why you know the apartment so well I just…don’t remember ever even meeting you. Are you sure?” He asked, looking at me now.

I nodded, “I’m sure, Tru.” I said.

“Well what, what do you expect now? I mean…what am I supposed to do for you?” He asked.

The question caught me off guard and made my heart ache. “I hadn’t gotten that far,” I whispered.

He bit his lip and looked away, “I don’t…”

“I’m not asking for anything, Tru. Would still love to be your friend, if I can do that.” I said, waiting for him to respond.

He turned and looked at me, “That’s cool. Friends. I can do that.” He said, nodding now. “I can do that.”


she finally found love and now he dosent even remember her
run it

:( oh noooo I am so sad now. Tru and Joy had the best relationship developing. Now they got into this car accident and Tru doesn't even remember Joy?? That's so sad. Joy can never catch a break. She has been through much to have to go through this now. Tru and Joy just said their "I love you's" and now Tru lost his memory?? No this can't be right at all. Add soon!! RUN IT!!!

NOOOOO!!! He has to rememember..

i'm hoping this is just a dream!!! tru and joy just got together =( run it!!!!!!!!!!

Oh lord!! i wasnt ready for that!!!!

that's jacked up! run it

Ohhh No!!!! He has to get his memory back!!!! Please let him be ok!! :((( Super sad!!

The one relationship I'm super excited about comes crashing down! Fix this nonsense before I cry some more *sniffles*


Awwwwww, I thought it was a dream as well!!! I wasn't expecting this at all. RUN IT!!!

Wait I thought it was a dream!?! Omg!

Omg awww dats so sad i hope he remeber her i hope she stay wit him n help him work threw this run it

Oh my GOD I hate youuuuuuuuuuu *cries uncontrollably* whyyyyyyyyyyyy ...whyyyyy? *sniffs*

NNNNNOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! i so wasnt prepared for that. RUN IT

Awwwwww noooo..right when they were making progress :(